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Writing Samples
Band 7

The line graph shows the information for internet users as percentage of population in three countries from 1999 and 2009

The line graph shows the information for internet users as percentage of population in three countries from 1999 and 2009
The line graph illustrates the data for internet users as a percentage of the population in three countries between 1999 to 2009
Overall
Linking Words
, in the three countries , all have increased over the period; there was an upward trend in Canada over the period. From 1999 and 2005, in Usa, wi-fi users has jumped from 20% in 1999 to 70% in 2005, and in 2007 to 2009, has gust increase by 10% and it stoped on 80%,
however
Linking Words
 in Mexico from 1999 and 2003, it went from around 6% to 20% and between 2005 to 2009, has rose from 30% to 40%.
Overall
Linking Words
, in Canada, there was an upward trend in the percentage over the period, between 1999 to 2003. The percentage went up in 1999, it was 10%
then
Linking Words
in
Punctuation problem
, in
show examples
 2003, it went to 60% and in 2005, it was 70%
then
Linking Words
 , in 2009 reached its peak at 100%

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "overall".
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 73%.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "trend" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.
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