IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

In many countries, people buy a wide range of household goods (television, microwaves, oven and rice cookers) Is it a positive or negative development?

Currently, many families are purchasing an array of household appliances. I believe these move has a positive impact as
it
Correct pronoun usage
they
show examples
eases
Correct subject-verb agreement
ease
show examples
 the chore in our home , making life better , and
as a
Linking Words
result
Add a comma
result,
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it
Correct pronoun usage
they
show examples
grows
Correct subject-verb agreement
grow
show examples
 a country's economy. The purchase of household furnishings makes chores easier in our homes since folks use them to lessen the
amount
Check wording
number
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 of tasks that need to be completed.
In
Change preposition
apply
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Moreover
Linking Words
, the use of
this
Linking Words
 equipment saves more
time
Use synonyms
 , where families can interact , considering that families nowadays hardly have enough
time
Use synonyms
 to bond
due to
Linking Words
the
Correct pronoun usage
their
show examples
 busy schedules.
For instance
Linking Words
, parents can multitask and spend
time
Use synonyms
 with their children
while
Linking Words
 they
prepared
Wrong verb form
prepare
show examples
 the meal in the oven and engage their children in play or revise some school assignment.
Therefore
Linking Words
, the use of these apparatus creates a work-life balance , which many individuals are
soughting
Correct your spelling
seeking
 after.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, a country's economy is opened up
due to
Linking Words
 the continuous purchase of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
electrical furnishings.
This
Linking Words
 is because a big population spend money
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 purchasing the items , and in
turn
Punctuation problem
turn,
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 an increase in production rate of the equipment results in having more manufacturing industries , which opens up the economy.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, job opportunities are created as many job seekers get employed and earn an income.
For instance
Linking Words
, countries like China are known for the production of electrical
equipments
Correct your spelling
equipment
, which
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
show examples
 recorded the highest sector that has employed individuals over
time
Use synonyms
. In conclusion, I believe the increasing trend of communities purchasing household accessories is beneficial as it makes life easier , creating family
time
Use synonyms
 and fosters economic growth in a country in a robust way as
persons
Check wording
people
show examples
 spend more.

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grammar
Fix grammar and spell mistakes. Check verb tense and subject/verb form.
task response
Make your main view clear in the first sentence. State your view and why.
coherence
Use clear linking words to show how ideas go together.
development
Give more proof for ideas. Add one or two good, simple examples.
style
Keep short, simple sentences. Break long lines into two.
idea
Your view is clear that appliances can ease chores.
example
You give an example about China to show how economy can grow.
structure
The essay has two main ideas: home life and economy.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • household goods
  • appliances
  • television
  • microwave
  • oven
  • rice cooker
  • convenience
  • time saving
  • comfort
  • safety
  • health
  • standard of living
  • cost
  • price
  • money
  • debt
  • affordable
  • energy
  • electricity bill
  • energy use
  • energy efficient
  • environment
  • waste
  • recycling
  • repair
  • maintenance
  • durable
  • long life
  • space
  • clutter
  • upgrade
  • buy
  • choice
  • habit
  • policy
  • regulation
  • warranty
  • reuse
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