IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

You are planning to go skiing next winter and you would like to get a group of friends together to come with you. Write a letter to a friend and invite them to come skiing. In the letter, Invite your friend to come Provide details of the holiday Tell your friend what they will need bring with them on the holiday You do NOT need to write any addresses

Dear Dara, How are you ? Hope you are fine .I am so happy to suggest a
city
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 for you and make suggestions about the jobs available in
Lincoln
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while
Linking Words
 giving an opinion about the
locals
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. The name of the
city
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 is
Lincoln
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,
Correct word choice
and
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it is a beautiful
city
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 located in the eastern part of the United Kingdom. It is known for its beauty and productivity.
Due to
Linking Words
 its productivity, many companies establish branches here ,
also
Linking Words
 creating a lot of
job
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 opportunities for people.
In addition
Linking Words
, the effective and efficient transportation system makes the transportation of people , goods easier and faster. Noticeably ,
Lincoln
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 is
also
Linking Words
 very quiet and peaceful. Most people will want to live there. Recently , the ageing population of
Lincoln
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 has been increasing,causing the establishment of more care homes , thereby creating more vacancies for support workers. I will recommend
you
Correct word choice
that you
show examples
 apply for a support worker role in
Lincoln
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 .
Similarly
Linking Words
, I will suggest you apply for a sales assistant role because of the abundance of sales companies like Currys, ASDA , etc in
Lincoln
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. With these applications, I believe you will acquire a
job
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 soon Admittedly, there are so many benefits gained by associating with
locals
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 . One of them is communications. When you socialise with the
locals
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, you will be able to derive key information about the
city
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,
job
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 opportunities and companies.
Moreover
Linking Words
, they are very friendly and nice.
This
Linking Words
 will improve the growth and development of many individuals in the
city
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.
For example
Linking Words
 , they helped me acquire my first employment as a sales assistant. With all these points, I would like to advise you to socialise with the
locals
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 because they are the pillars of the
city
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.
Overall
Linking Words
, I believe that
Lincoln
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 is the best
city
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 for you since it has all the basic amenities like a quiet environment, a good transportation system and a supportive society. These amenities will make your life stable for 6 months
while
Linking Words
 working. It
also
Linking Words
 has a lot of
job
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 opportunities waiting for you. I really hope you decide to move
Use synonyms
Lincoln
Change preposition
to Lincoln
show examples
. It will be the best decision of your life. I can't wait to hear from you again. Best wishes,

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task response
Your letter does not meet the task prompt. It should invite your friend to ski, give details of the holiday such as place, dates, activities, and how to join.
coherence and cohesion
Improve coherence by making one idea per paragraph and using clear linking words. Start with the purpose, then describe the holiday, then list what to bring, then close.
structure
Greeting and closing are present.
tone
Friendly tone and polite style.
coherence
Some connectors help the flow.

Structure your letter

A letter needs to be written using a proper format, including the following:

  • A greeting (Dear sir/madam, Dear John, Dear Mr. Smith)
  • The main body (consisting of paragraphs for each part of the letter)
  • A closing (Yours sincerely, Yours faithfully, Best wishes, Kind regards, Love)

When writing a letter as part of the IELTS General Training Writing Task 1, it is important to include the bullet points presented to you in the question.

All three bullet points need to be presented. And remember that some bullet points contain more than one element. So, make sure to watch for ‘and’ and plurals.

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