IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3.5

some people say that in order to be happy, you must have a job you love doing. others say that other factors are more important do you think that people cần only be happy if they have a job they really enjoy

There is no denying the fact that work has a crucial impact on our lives.
While
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 it is commonly held that having a job we like will make us happy, there is
also
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 an argument that opposes it. In my opinion, I consider that you should have a job you love doing.
To begin
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 with, life is
once
Use the right word
one
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 we should spend every second wisely.
In other words
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, the
workingis asignificant
Correct your spelling
working is a significant
 part of our day, and you will not be happy in every moment.
In addition
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, doing something you like helps you to improve, and that changes your life
to
Change preposition
for
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 be better.
For example
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, if you are working in electrical engineering, and you love
it
Punctuation problem
it,
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 you will get better every day that comes back to you, with a good salary that helps you in everything. In conclusion, despite people having different views, I believe that the job has a substantial effect on your life because we ought to do what we love .

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planning
Plan your writing first. Make four small parts: view, reason, example, end.
grammar
Use simple, short sentences. Check grammar so verbs and nouns fit. Avoid hard words.
structure
Put ideas in good order. Start with why, then how it helps, then a clear example.
lexical
Use common words in all parts. Keep meaning clear and steady.
content
Give one clear example to back each main idea.
content
Your view is clear: you want a job you love.
content
You give a reason why liking the work can help you grow.
structure
You end with your own view, which is good for a short essay.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • happy
  • job
  • work
  • love
  • enjoy
  • like
  • fun
  • money
  • pay
  • time
  • life
  • health
  • family
  • friends
  • stress
  • balance
  • stable
  • secure
  • safe
  • career
  • purpose
  • satisfaction
  • energy
  • plan
  • idea
  • view
  • opinion
  • on the one hand
  • on the other hand
  • overall
  • for many people
  • happiness
  • growth
What to do next:
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