IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

You are leaving your job and would like to recommend your friend apply for your position. 
Write a letter to your friend. In your letter: * ·  describe the job * ·  explain the reason you are leaving * ·  tell him/her why you would recommend the job to them

Dear Rohan, I hope you are doing well. I want to let you know that I am quitting my
job
Use synonyms
 , so I think you are the suitable candidate for my replacement
from
Punctuation problem
, from
show examples
 one of my friends. As you know that I have been working at Tim Horton's for the
last
Linking Words
 three years as a manager. There are some responsibilities for
this
Linking Words
 position, including assigning tasks to other staff members, managing inventories and taking care of sales.
Firstly
Linking Words
, it is a little bit stressful , but after some time it
would
Wrong verb form
will
show examples
 become convenient. All the staff members are quite friendly and supportive ,
Linking Words
thus
Rephrase
so
show examples
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
 I think you would enjoy working. The reason for leaving
this
Linking Words
 position is that I am going back home for three months to spend some quality time with my family. After that, I am going to apply for a technician
job
Use synonyms
 to follow up in my field.
Once
Change preposition
As
show examples
 you mentioned, you're looking for a full-time
job
Use synonyms
 for
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
college placement,
thus
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
 is an excellent opportunity for you.
Additionally
Linking Words
, you can meet different people who belong to other nations and talk to them because I know you're
extroverted
Correct article usage
an extroverted
show examples
 person and like
this
Linking Words
job
Use synonyms
. Let me know
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
 when I can arrange your interview with my employer if you are keen interested for it. Best Wishes, Abdi

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

structure
Make the letter clearer by using four short parts: intro, job details, reason for leaving, and why your friend may fit. Task becomes easy to read.
grammar
Fix grammar and use simple words. For example, use First instead of Firstly, and 'the right person' instead of 'the suitable candidate'.
readability
Keep sentences short and clean. Break long lines into small, easy to read bits.
punctuation
Check punctuation. Put a period at the end of each sentence and not extra spaces before commas.
tone
Polite and warm tone.
content
It clearly states why you leave and what the friend could gain.
action
It offers to help set up an interview.
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: