IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The diagram below shows how rain water is collected and then treated to be used as drinking water in an Australian town. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

The diagram below shows how rain water is collected and then treated to be used as drinking water in an Australian town. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
The diagram provides key information about
process
Correct article usage
the process
show examples
 of accumulating and treating
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
rainwater to generate drinking
water
Use synonyms
 in an Australian town.
Overall
Linking Words
, it is clear from the graph that
this
Linking Words
 procedure is heavily dependent on the rain.
Hence
Linking Words
, there are five steps under the ground to produce
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
healthy
water
Use synonyms
 from the beginning to the end.
According to
Linking Words
 what is shown, the collected rainwater is the first stage,
then
Linking Words
water
Use synonyms
 flows to a special reservoir via a drain to filter it in the dam. After that, filtered
water
Use synonyms
 is
stroed
Correct your spelling
stored
 in a big pool. Follow
this
Linking Words
, the treatment stage has come, which intricate operation. The final step is
Verb problem
to chemicals
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chemicals remove
Correct word order
remove chemicals
show examples
 from the
water
Use synonyms
 treatment by a designated machine. Now, the drinking
water
Use synonyms
 is ready to use and is being
distributing
Wrong verb form
distributed
show examples
 to houses by tubes throughout the town. In conclusion,
this
Linking Words
 process generally reflects that treated
water
Use synonyms
 undergoes complex stages, which
requires
Correct subject-verb agreement
require
show examples
 more concentration and work.

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Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
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Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
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Basic structure: Change the fifth paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words water with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Only 5 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fifth paragraph.
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