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Band 5.5

the charts show information about the percentage of men and women age 60-64 who were eployed in four countries in 1970 ad 2000

the charts show information about the percentage of men and women age 60-64 who were eployed in four countries in 1970 ad 2000
The bar charts compare the proportion of men and women who are employed at the age of 60-64 in four nations, in 1970 and 2000.
Overall
Linking Words
, it can be observed that most people continue working at the age of 60-64 in 1997, yet in 2000 the percentage declined by
approxamitly
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approximately
 50%. Taking a closer look, 1970 recorded more than 50% of employed individuals of both genders in all
fours
Fix the agreement mistake
four
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contries
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countries
. The lowest
percent
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per cent
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 was for women in Japan
with
Punctuation problem
, with
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 around 45%
while
Linking Words
 the highest was for Indonesia and
USA
Correct article usage
the USA
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 men, both reaching 85%.
By contrast
Linking Words
, Belgium shows the highest unemployment rate for females with less than 10% as workers,
while
Linking Words
 the rate
on
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in
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 the other three countries was very similar
roughly
Punctuation problem
, roughly
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aroung
Correct your spelling
around
 40% and more.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, the peak was for
USA
Correct article usage
the USA
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mean
Verb problem
apply
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with 80%.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
โ–ผ
Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
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