The line graph shows how much money overseas visitors spent in the UK from 1980 - 2010 and the pie charts show the reasons for their visits in 1980 and 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant. Money spend in the UK by overseas visitors Reasons for visit

The line graph shows how much money overseas visitors spent in the UK from 1980 - 2010 and the pie charts show the reasons for their visits in 1980 and 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant. Money spend in the UK by overseas visitors Reasons for visit
IELTS Writing Task Chart for The line graph shows how much money overseas visitors spent in the UK from 1980 - 2010 and the pie charts show the reasons for their visits in 1980 and 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant. Money spend in the UK by overseas visitors Reasons for visit
The line
garph
Correct your spelling
graph
illustrates the total amount of expenditures made by overseas tourısts in the UK, between 1980 and 2010, and the pie charts
depicts
Correct subject-verb agreement
depict
show examples
the
break down
Use the right word
breakdown
show examples
of visit types in 1980 and 2010.
Overall
Linking Words
, it
seen
Verb problem
is seen
show examples
that
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
tourist expenditures increased gradually
,
Punctuation problem
.
show examples
Furthermore
Linking Words
, holiday
stayed
Replace the word
stays
show examples
as the most dominant reason for their visits.
Firstly
Linking Words
, total expenditure was nearly $8000 in 1980, following a decrease and
also
Linking Words
bottemed
Correct your spelling
bottomed
under
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
$7500 in 1982. After that,
gradually
Correct pronoun usage
it gradually
show examples
increased and peaked at $12000 in 1997.
Linking Words
then
Fix capitalization
Then
show examples
follow
Wrong verb form
followed
show examples
a
fluctuated
Replace the word
fluctuating
show examples
pattern and decreased to $10700 in 2010.
Secondly
Linking Words
, in
1980
Punctuation problem
1980,
show examples
the most dominant reason for visiting was "holiday" and accounted for 44.1% of
total
Correct article usage
the total
show examples
amount, but decreased to 39.1% in 2010.
Similarly
Linking Words
, "others"
also
Linking Words
decreased from 16.6% to 9.8% in 2010.
Whereas
Linking Words
, "business" and "visiting friends and relatives" rose and it's popularity among tourists
and
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
increased from 18.7% to 28.2% for close-knit visits and from 20.7% to 22.8% over the years.
To sum up
Linking Words
,
visitors
Check wording
visitors'
show examples
spending steadily increased over the years
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
holiday
Fix the agreement mistake
holidays
show examples
kept
its
Fix the agreement mistake
their
show examples
popularity
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
spite
Use the right word
despite
show examples
over passing
30
Change preposition
of 30
show examples
years.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also".
Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "decrease" was used 4 times.
Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 4 times.
Vocabulary: The word "gradually" was used 2 times.
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