IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

The increasing reliance on the Internet and digital technology is having a detrimental effects on people’s ability to focus and think critically. To what extent do you agree or disagree

There is a view that the
number
Check wording
increase
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of
Change preposition
in
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increasing
Verb problem
apply
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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trust
ness
Use synonyms
 on
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
internet
Use synonyms
 systems is having a great effect on an individual's
thinking
Correct word choice
critical thinking
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critically
Rephrase
apply
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abilities
Punctuation problem
abilities,
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while
Linking Words
 others say that it can bring harm
,
Punctuation problem
.
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 I personally believe that it can have the best impact on their life. On the one hand, these days
many
Punctuation problem
, many
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people
Use synonyms
 prefer to use digital technology in their daily
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
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.
That is
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 to say that
,
Punctuation problem
apply
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 many
people
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 use the
internet
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 for their worksheets
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such
Punctuation problem
, such
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 as for their applications, tasks,
Correct word choice
and documents
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documents
Punctuation problem
documents,
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that
Correct pronoun usage
which
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 the
internet
Use synonyms
 can help
in
Change preposition
with
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 all lack of
Use synonyms
ness
Check wording
necessity
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.
For example
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, some companies cannot offer extra money for
lack
Correct article usage
a lack
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 of
Use synonyms
ness
Check wording
necessity
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 in paper materials, so the
internet
Use synonyms
 can do it in online
version
Fix the agreement mistake
versions
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styles
Check wording
apply
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, and
that is
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 a much more convenient way to understand and work on it.
As a result
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, the
internet
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 can stay the most convenient option to use in workloads.
However
Linking Words
, there can be some negative sides
of
Change preposition
to
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 it
,
Punctuation problem
;
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 the
internet
Use synonyms
 cannot offer everything for responsibility because of not
figuring out
Verb problem
addressing
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 the problem.
Thus
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, the
internet
Use synonyms
 must be used for normal purposes.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, the
internet
Use synonyms
 can have some negative sides. That's to say that using digital technology cannot create new programs or other new skills to get for individuals.
For example
Linking Words
, many employees just desire to work in a good sphere and in good
work places
Use the right word
workplaces
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,
Linking Words
however
Punctuation problem
however,
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 with just using only
internet
Use synonyms
systems
Punctuation problem
systems,
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 they can't get experience or learn new skills.
As a result
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,
this
Linking Words
 can lead to
lack
Correct article usage
a lack
show examples
 of
Use synonyms
ness
Check wording
necessity
show examples
 in employees, and
also
Linking Words
 the
internet
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 can damage their ability
like
Punctuation problem
, like
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 focusing on tasks or being able to think critically.
However
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, there can be an opposite view for that
like
Punctuation problem
, like
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 with using
internet
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 systems
everything
Punctuation problem
, everything
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 can
done
Verb problem
be done
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 easily.
Thus
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,
people
Use synonyms
 should know the
limit
Fix the agreement mistake
limits
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 of using the
internet
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. In conclusion,
while
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 some
people
Use synonyms
 say that using digital technology can be great,
however
Linking Words
, I personally believe that there must be a limit
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
 using it.

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task response
State a clear view in the intro and keep this view in all body parts.
grammar
Use simple, short sentences. Fix big grammar and spelling errors.
content
Give one or two clear examples that match what you say.
coherence
Link ideas with small words like and, but, also, however.
structure
Make paragraphs. Intro, two main parts, and a short end.
grammar
Check words that look odd. Some wrong forms can make readers lose trust.
structure
The piece has a basic plan with intro, body, and conclusion.
argument
The writer tries to discuss both sides of the topic.
lexical
The words are simple and the writing is easy to read if the errors are fixed.
Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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