IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

It is suggested that the best way to reduce traffic congestion is to increase the fuel price. But, many people believe that the given suggestion is undesirable, and it has got many adverse effects. Discuss both views and arrive at your opinion.

Nowadays,
traffic
Use synonyms
 congestion has been a growing concern in many regions, especially the
metropolitian
Correct your spelling
metropolitan
 cities. Several measures have been adopted to limit its impact on
the
Correct article usage
apply
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society.
While
Linking Words
 some
people
Use synonyms
 opine that a hike in the
fuel
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price
Use synonyms
 can be a potential solution, others argue that
such
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 a rise in cost can be detrimental. The following essay discusses both
the
Correct article usage
apply
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views in detail before presenting my opinion. Proponents of the argument favour increasing
fuel
Use synonyms
Use synonyms
price
Fix the agreement mistake
prices
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 as
it
Correct pronoun usage
they
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 cannot be afforded by everyone. When the cost of petroleum products is raised, it will have a direct impact
in
Change preposition
on
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 the everyday budget of a common man. As he cannot afford it, a significant reduction in
the
Correct article usage
apply
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traffic
Use synonyms
 can be expected.
For instance
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, over the past decade, the
fuel
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price
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 in Kerala, a small state in India, has surged steeply, reaching double the value. Eventually, individuals sought alternate travel options
such
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 as reliance on
public
Correct article usage
the public
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 transport system and car-sharing to work.
On the other hand
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, critics argue that hiking the cost can
effect
Use the right word
affect
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 the
people
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adversly
Correct your spelling
adversely
.
While
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 the
price
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 of
fuel
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is
Verb problem
has
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 increased, it can indirectly affect other industries as well. Transportation of raw materials
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as
Punctuation problem
, as
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 well as many industrial
Replace the word
machines
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machinery
Punctuation problem
machinery,
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 relies heavily on petroleum byproducts to function.
Consequently
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, inflation will set in.
For example
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, a hike in
fuel
Use synonyms
Use synonyms
price
Fix the agreement mistake
prices
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 is often followed by an increase in the
price
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 of food items,
such
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 as fruits and vegetables, since their transportation charges
also
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 climb up. In my opinion, I strongly feel that a
price
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 hike is undesirable as it can pave
way
Correct article usage
the way
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 to inflation and thereby affect the living standard of
people
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. To aid in
Correct article usage
the decogestion
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decogestion
Correct your spelling
decongestion
 of
traffic
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,
alternate
Replace the word
alternative
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 measures,
such
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 as promoting public transport, can be adopted. An affordable and reliable public transport system can
foster
Verb problem
encourage
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people
Use synonyms
 to
diverge
Verb problem
divest
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 from driving in their own vehicles to
office
Correct article usage
the office
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;
hence
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, reducing congestion on
Correct article usage
the road
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road
Fix the agreement mistake
roads
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. In conclusion, with proper public infrastructure development for transportation,
traffic
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 congestion can be reduced, unlike increasing
fuel
Use synonyms
Use synonyms
price
Fix the agreement mistake
prices
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, which may lead to unwanted consequences eventually. Both the government and individuals can join
in
Change preposition
apply
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hands to contribute to help in decongestion on roads.

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task response
Be clear on your main idea at the start and restate it in the end.
task response
Add strong and clear examples that fit the idea you make.
coherence
Make each paragraph about one idea; start with a clear topic sentence.
coherence
Use simple linking words to join ideas and fix spelling and grammar.
strength
You show a clear view and give your own opinion.
strength
You discuss both sides and give a plan to cut traffic.
strength
You give a real place example to back a point.
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