IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

in the modern world it is possible to shop, work and communicate with people via the internet and live without any face-to-face contact with others. Show the advantages and disadvantages of this.

The world today has changed , and that includes how
people
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 communicate and
work
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. Nowadays, it is easy to communicate ,
work
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 and shop online . Everyone can communicate
by
Change preposition
on
show examples
 the internet
instead
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 of seeing
people
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face
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 to
face
Use synonyms
 .
This
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 essay will examine the advantages and disadvantages of
this
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 topic . On the one hand , there are many advantages
of
Change preposition
to
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 doing everything online . First ,
internet
Correct article usage
the internet
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 is very
convenience
Replace the word
convenient
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.
For example
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 ,
instead
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 of
communicate
Wrong verb form
communicating
show examples
face
Use synonyms
 to
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face
Punctuation problem
face,
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 everyone can chat online.
Also
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 , working online by computer will let
people
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 save time . Second , using the internet will make
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people
Check wording
people's
show examples
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
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 flexible .
For instance
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 , they can
work
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 or study any time without strict schedules .
Moreover
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, they will not have
specific
Correct article usage
a specific
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 time to
work
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 or study.
Finally
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, everybody can have opportunities.
For example
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 ,
people
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 can
work
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 for companies in other countries .
Therefore
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, they can take online courses and speak to
people
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 from different countries .
However
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,
on the other hand
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 ,
There
Fix capitalization
there
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 are several disadvantages of doing
every thing
Use the right word
everything
show examples
 online . First , that can
causes
Wrong verb form
cause
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 health problems .
For example
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 , when somebody
sit
Correct subject-verb agreement
sits
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 all day in
bad
Correct article usage
a bad
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 that can cause headaches .
In addition
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 , they will have less physical activity . Second , their communication skills will be poor . When they communicate
online
Punctuation problem
online,
show examples
 it will be difficult for them to talk with
people
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face
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 to
face
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 .
Moreover
Linking Words
, their social skills will be weak .
Finally
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,
people
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's
work
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 will be imbalanced . Sometimes , they have
work
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 at home , and they
also
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 do some tasks online . Some
people
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 can not balance
between
Change preposition
apply
show examples
their
work
Use synonyms
 and their personal life . In conclusion, there are a number of excellent advantages of communicating through technology.
However
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, there are some drawbacks
and
Punctuation problem
, and
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 in some cases
Verb problem
,
show examples
face
Use synonyms
 to
Use synonyms
face
Check wording
face-to-face
show examples
 is better.
However
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 , everyone should know how to use it
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
and how to balance their life .

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grammar
work on spelling and grammar; fix small errors like missing words and wrong forms.
coherence
Use more linking words to connect ideas, such as 'however', 'for example', 'in addition', and make your flow smoother.
structure
Keep a steady plan: intro, body, and conclusion. Make sure each idea fits the question.
content
Give clear examples that match the point you make.
vocabulary
Use simple words the same way many people can read. Do not use hard words unless you know them well.
structure
The essay follows a clear plan with an intro, body, and conclusion.
task
It shows both sides of the topic.
content
There are chances to give easy examples from life.
Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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