IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3

Write a report for a university lecturer describing the information in the two graphs below.

The two graphs illustrate the proportions of
highest
Correct article usage
the highest
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 level of education of
women
Use synonyms
 in
someland
Fix capitalization
Someland
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 between 1945 and 1995, which involves 7 features
,
Punctuation problem
:
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 no schooling, third grade, year 6, year 9, year 12, first degree and
post graduate
Use the right word
post-graduate
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. From the two graphs, it can be seen that there has been a significant improvement in the education level of
women
Use synonyms
. The
proportion
Use synonyms
 of illiterate
women
Use synonyms
 decreased from 70% in 1945 to 0% in 1995.
On the contrary
Linking Words
, the
proportion
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 of
women
Use synonyms
 with a bachelor's degree has increased from 1% in 1945 to 50% in 1995. The two charts show the same
proportion
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. In 1945, the
proportion
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 of female illiteracy and
third grade
Use the right word
third-grade
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 students was the same at 35%,
while
Linking Words
 in 1995, the
proportion
Use synonyms
 of female
12th grade
Use the right word
12th-grade
show examples
 and graduate students was the same at 20%. The
proportion
Use synonyms
 of
women
Use synonyms
 with nine years of education experience remained stable at 10% in both 1945 and 1995.

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task response
Task response: Add a clear overview of the main changes in both years. This helps show the big picture.
task response
Task response: Check the data very carefully. Some points may be wrong or not fully true.
task response
Task response: Include more key numbers from both graphs to compare the groups better.
coherence and cohesion
Coherence and cohesion: Group ideas in a clearer way. Put similar education levels together.
coherence and cohesion
Coherence and cohesion: Use simple linking words like 'while', 'in contrast', and 'by 1995' to make the report flow better.
coherence and cohesion
Coherence and cohesion: Write one clear overview paragraph and then two body parts with details.
task response
Task response: You mention key changes over time, such as the fall in no schooling and the rise in higher education.
task response
Task response: You use some numbers to support your points.
coherence and cohesion
Coherence and cohesion: The report has a basic paragraph structure.
coherence and cohesion
Coherence and cohesion: Some comparison words are used, such as 'on the contrary' and 'while'.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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