IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 0.5

Today more and more tourists are visiting places where conditions are difficult, such as the Shara desert or the Antarctic. What are the benefits and disadvantages for tourists who visit such places?

Most of the work sits in one BCR-ABL1 positive line, a single KCL-22 xenograft and a simple model. That leaves other CML clones and resistance routes
are left
Verb problem
apply
show examples
mostly out. The authors mainly look at changes within BCR-ABL1, not at downstream pathways or patient factors. In patients, ABL001 is still in early “phase I” as a single agent in small CML groups, as they describe one CML case in detail. So far, no one has yet tested ABL001-TKI pairs or
treatment-free
Correct article usage
the treatment-free
show examples
 remission idea in patients.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

structural
Plan more. Add a short intro and a short end. Give 2-3 main ideas with links.
content
Make each line show one clear idea. Tie ideas with simple link words like first, then, also, but.
content
Add more simple facts or examples to support points.
strength
The text uses real facts about the topic.
strength
There is a steady focus on the topic.
Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Resilience and adaptability
  • Remote and challenging locations
  • Sense of adventure
  • Achievement
  • Natural environment
  • Diverse ecosystems
  • Harsh conditions
  • Remoteness
  • Peaceful and personal experience
  • Logistically difficult
  • Safety risks
  • Extreme weather conditions
  • Specialized skills
  • Navigation and survival skills
  • Fragile ecosystems
  • Impact of tourism
  • Local wildlife
  • Physical discomforts
  • Extreme temperatures
  • Isolation
What to do next:
Look at other essays: