IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Environmental protection should be the responsibility of politicians, not individuals as individuals can do too little. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Nowadays, the topic of whether politicians should take the responsibility to protect the environment has sparked considerable debate worldwide. Some people contend that individuals can not make commitments to environmental protection. From my perspective, I strongly disagree with
this
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 opinion
,
Punctuation problem
. This
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this
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 essay will dive deeper into the reasons behind my conviction. Admittedly, environmental issues are too big for individuals to some extent. Since environmental issues
such
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 as global warming and the
rising
Replace the word
rise
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of
Change preposition
in
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 sea level are pressing, exerting
nagative
Correct your spelling
negative
 impacts both on human beings and wild animals.
Governements
Correct your spelling
Governments
 from different countries should take the major responsibility to address global environmental problems and
prompt
Verb problem
promote
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 the protection
progress
Check wording
apply
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. As mitigating these issues needs large quantities of human resources and financial
supports
Fix the agreement mistake
support
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which
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, which
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 ordinary people couldn't afford.
For example
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,
buiding
Correct your spelling
building
 natural reserves and
controling
Correct your spelling
controlling
 carbon footprints. Apart from that,
technology
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technological
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 advances are essential for us to overcome the difficulties during
this
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 process, enhancing eco
However
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, it is widely
ackowledged
Correct your spelling
acknowledged
 that human activities,
such
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 as deforestation and pollution, are major contributors to environmental
degradtion
Correct your spelling
degradation
.
Hence
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, everyone can contribute to the protection of
environment
Correct article usage
the environment
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 through everyday actions.
For instance
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, reducing the usage of
disposal
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disposable
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 products and taking public transport
instead
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 of driving a private car
which
Punctuation problem
, which
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emitts
Correct your spelling
emits
 polluted gas.
Furthermore
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, it is crucial for people to participate
motr
Correct your spelling
more
 in various environmental
protaction
Correct your spelling
protection
organizations
Change the spelling
organisations
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 and
programspeople
Correct your spelling
programs
 so that raising the awareness that it is everyone can make a contribution to improve the environment.
Additionally
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,
for
Change preposition
apply
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manufacturers
，
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apply
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they
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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 should simplify packages, avoiding excessive waste. In conclusion, it is far not enough for politicians
work
Verb problem
to work
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 solely to tackle environmental problems
,
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;
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 everyone and governments should make
jointly efforts
Correct word order
efforts jointly
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. Only with the cooperation of every sector in the whole society
,
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apply
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 can we build a more beautiful
as well as
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habitual
Correct word choice
habitable
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 world.

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structure
Plan your essay first. Say your view in a clear line at the start.
logic
Keep one idea in each part. Do not add too many ideas in one paragraph.
linking
Use link words to show how ideas go, such as and, but, also.
grammar
Fix wrong spellings and end each sentence well.
content
Give real and short examples to show how people can help.
conclusion
End with a short, clear last thought.
content
The writer gives a clear view that both gov and people have a role.
evidence
There are some good ideas and examples to show how one can help.
structure
The writing has three or four parts and a closing line.
Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • environmental protection
  • responsibility
  • politicians
  • individuals
  • large-scale
  • policies
  • regulations
  • impact
  • corporations
  • environmentally friendly practices
  • resources
  • expertise
  • collective efforts
  • difference
  • combination
  • crucial
  • effective
What to do next:
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