IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The graph and table below give information about water use worldwide and water consumption in two different countries. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisions where relevant.

The graph and table
compares
Correct subject-verb agreement
compare
show examples
 the
water
Use synonyms
 consumption in Brazil and
Democratic
Correct article usage
the Democratic
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 Republic of
Congo
Use synonyms
Linking Words
along
Punctuation problem
, along
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 with
its
Fix the agreement mistake
their
show examples
 usage in three different sources from 1900 to 2000. The figures are expressed in km3.
Overall
Linking Words
, the most striking feature is that
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
agriculture clearly maintained a lead over other
modes
Punctuation problem
modes,
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whereas
Linking Words
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
 domestic use stood at the
last
Linking Words
 position in terms of
water
Use synonyms
utilization
Change the spelling
utilisation
show examples
.
To begin
Linking Words
 with, the total amount of
water
Use synonyms
 consumed by Brazil peaked in irrigated land with 26,500 km2 and the average usage by each individual market
around
Verb problem
was around
show examples
 359 m3.
On the other hand
Linking Words
,
Congo
Use synonyms
 had reported
water
Use synonyms
 by 100 km2
irrigation
Change preposition
of irrigation
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 land and the average
by
Change preposition
of
show examples
 8 m3. Brazil surpassed
Congo
Use synonyms
 in population with 176 million
Linking Words
while
Punctuation problem
, while
show examples
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
Congo
Use synonyms
 had reported 5.2 million. In
converse
Check wording
contrast
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,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
agriculture was the highest mode of global use
crossing
Punctuation problem
, crossing
show examples
 3,000 km3.
In addition
Linking Words
, industries stood
at
Change preposition
in
show examples
 the second position by slightly less than 2,000 km3.
In contrast
Linking Words
, domestic use remained
at
Change preposition
in
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
last
Linking Words
 position with less than 1,000 km3.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "last".
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Vocabulary: Replace the words water, congo, km with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "stood" was used 2 times.
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