IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The table below shows how the UK unemployed spent their time last year. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The table represents
types
Correct article usage
the types
show examples
 of activities performed by the UK jobless people throughout a day
last
Linking Words
 year. It includes the percentages of popularity for each mentioned option of
time
Use synonyms
spending
Punctuation problem
spending,
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 separated by
person's
Correct article usage
a person's
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 sex (man or woman) and daytime,
such
Linking Words
 as morning or afternoon.
Overall
Linking Words
, based on the presented data: housework, shopping, job hunting
and
Punctuation problem
, and
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 meeting with friends or relatives are the most popular activities for unemployed UK residents. Generally, women spend more
time
Use synonyms
 on housework and shopping,
while
Linking Words
 for men it is more common to hunt for jobs or work in the garden.
Additionally
Linking Words
, for everyone,
not depending on
Verb problem
regardless of
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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sex, it is more usual to do all these activities during the morning, except watching TV or simply procrastinating. Specifically, the huge amount of
time
Use synonyms
 spent by women on doing housework stands out
comparing
Wrong verb form
compared
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 to men
with
Punctuation problem
, with
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 49% and 21% in the morning and in the afternoon
Linking Words
Punctuation problem
, accordingly
show examples
accordingly
Rephrase
respectively
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. In response, gardening is several times more common for males
with
Punctuation problem
, with
show examples
 27
accumulative
Use the right word
cumulative
show examples
 per cent,
while
Linking Words
 only 5 per cent of females tend to spend
time
Use synonyms
 in the garden.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words time with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
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