IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

The graph below shows the average number of people attending top-level football matches in three European countries from 1980 to 2004. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The given line chart
dedicates
Verb problem
shows
show examples
 the changes
of
Change preposition
in
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 the average attendance per top-level football match in three European countries,
like
Change preposition
apply
show examples
Italy, England, and Germany, between 1980 and 2004.
Overall
Linking Words
, the average attendance per top-level football match witnessed a significant fluctuation in three European countries.
While
Linking Words
 the data of Italy saw a downward trend,
Linking Words
while
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the upward trend can be seen in England and Germany. In terms of England's data, the figures
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
decrease
Replace the word
decreased
show examples
 from over 20% to 22% units between 1980 and 1986. There was a significant increase
by
Change preposition
of
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 over 10% from 1986 to 2004.
Besides
Linking Words
, the data of Germany
was
Verb problem
showed
show examples
slow
Correct article usage
a slow
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 drop from 1980 to
1986
Punctuation problem
1986,
show examples
units between
Check wording
with a range of
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 25%
and
Correct word choice
apply
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18%. There was a steady rocket from 18% in 1986 to 33% in 2004. Regarding the statistics of Italy, the average
attendence
Correct your spelling
attendance
 per top-level football match
was
Verb problem
apply
show examples
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
rise
Replace the word
rose
show examples
 from 35% to 37% units between 1980 and 1986. Ultimately, the figures a
consider
Wrong verb form
considered
show examples
Verb problem
to have decline
show examples
decline
Replace the word
declined
show examples
 by over 10% from 1986 to 2004.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: The word "figures" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "figures" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "data" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "trend" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "significant" was used 2 times.
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