IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Not enough students choose science subjects in universities in many countries. What are the reasons and what are the impacts on our society

One of the pressing issues facing modern society is
an
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 inadequate number of
students
Use synonyms
 opting for
science
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subjects
Use synonyms
 at universities
in
Change preposition
around
show examples
 the world.
While
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
 problem
stetms
Correct your spelling
stems
 from several factors, its consequences pose a serious challenge to society. One key reason is perceptions about their difficulty.
In other words
Linking Words
,
students
Use synonyms
 rarely choose
science
Use synonyms
subjects
Use synonyms
, as they are usually regarded as the most complex.
According to
Linking Words
 surveys, 44% of pupils in secondary school consider them the hardest
subjects
Use synonyms
 to learn at school, which
discourage
Correct subject-verb agreement
discourages
show examples
 them not to
make
Verb problem
pursuing
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 them
their
Change preposition
as their
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 majors in the long term.
Furthermore
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, lack of inspiration and motivation
are of
Verb problem
is the
show examples
 primary cause. In some countries, nowadays, especially in rural areas, chemistry, biology, and physics teachers give lessons
too
Rephrase
apply
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theoretically
instead
Linking Words
 of relying on practical work when explaining. The majority of
students
Use synonyms
 have gotten used to rote memorisation, which undermines interest in
science
Use synonyms
.
In addition
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,
this
Linking Words
is
Verb problem
apply
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issue is largely attributed to
students
Use synonyms
' short-term career appeal in other fields,
such
Linking Words
 as IT, business, or languages. The problem may lead to far-reaching repercussions; the first of which is the shortage of professionals, including doctors,
engineeers
Correct your spelling
engineers
, researchers, and scientists.
For example
Linking Words
, the UK usually relies on foreign medics in the domain of medicine, since its own local people do not show great
interset
Use the right word
interest
show examples
 in
such
Linking Words
subjects
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 and choose other jobs.
Moreover
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, the trend results in slow technological and scientific progress in a nation, as innovation hugely depends on
researchs
Correct your spelling
research
, namely the country with
such
Linking Words
problem
Correct article usage
a problem
show examples
 is
high
Replace the word
highly
show examples
 likely to lag behind
instead
Linking Words
 of developing. Another impact of
this
Linking Words
 development in society gives rise to economic crisis, because
science
Use synonyms
 and technology
drives
Correct subject-verb agreement
drive
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 high-value industries, which make countries struggle to grow
economy
Correct pronoun usage
their economy
show examples
. India is currently advancing in
science
Use synonyms
;
nevertheless
Linking Words
, some sectors lack experts. In conclusion,
while
Linking Words
 the issue derives from numerous underlying causes, it may give rise to a number of consequences.

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Task Response
Plan your essay. Start with a clear idea. Then give two or three reasons with detail. End with a short, strong answer.
Coherence and Cohesion
Make the writing flow well. Put one main idea in each paragraph. Use link words to move from one idea to the next.
Content
The topic is clear and the issue is stated.
Ideas
You give some real examples that show the issue.
Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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