IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

In the future, people may no longer be able to pay for things in shops using cash. All payments may have to be made by card or phone. Do you think this will happen one day? Why do you think some people might not be happy to give up using cash?

Perhaps, electric payments will completely replace
cash
Use synonyms
 in a
forseeable
Correct your spelling
foreseeable
 future. I agree
with
Change preposition
that
show examples
this
Linking Words
 will occur soon, but someone may not appreciate
this
Linking Words
 change because collecting
cash
Use synonyms
 as their habits. To
beign
Correct your spelling
begin
, increasingly developed nations allow to adopt paying by card or phone in daily transactions because the convenience and security of cell phones are
admitted
Verb problem
acknowledged
show examples
. To illustrate, the popularity and
prevelence
Correct your spelling
prevalence
 of using smartphones are far greater in
western
Fix capitalization
Western
show examples
 countries. One of the main benefits
in
Change preposition
of
show examples
 e-payment refers to
reduce
Wrong verb form
reducing
show examples
 the risk of receiving fake
cash
Use synonyms
. Most
restuarants
Correct your spelling
restaurants
 cannot be equipped
a
Change preposition
with a
show examples
high quality
Use the right word
high-quality
show examples
mechaine
Correct your spelling
machine
 to
recongise
Correct your spelling
recognise
 fake currency, so they would lose their profit by getting fake
money
Use synonyms
. Using e-currency can
eradicate to
Verb problem
prevent
show examples
this
Linking Words
 issue
happen
Wrong verb form
from happening
show examples
.
In addition
Linking Words
, digital currency
is not
Verb problem
cannot
show examples
 able to be easily stolen by
theifs
Correct your spelling
thieves
, and
therefore
Linking Words
 the customers are secure to adopt
this
Linking Words
 technology.
Thus
Linking Words
, e-payment is beneficial to users and governments.
However
Linking Words
, collecting traditional
cash
Use synonyms
 is a
hung
Correct word choice
hard
show examples
 habit to many individuals.
A paper
Correct determiner usage
Paper
show examples
money
Use synonyms
 comprises iconic and symbolic meaning of a country
Punctuation problem
, owning
show examples
owning
Use the right word
owing
show examples
 to showing the royal family and
unqiue
Correct your spelling
unique
 landscapes.
For instance
Linking Words
, the Queen revealed
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 British paper
money
Use synonyms
 for decades. A larger number of collectors favour
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the royal images. If all
money
Use synonyms
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
 replaced by digital payment, the next generation may lose an opportunity to learn
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
history. In conclusion, the rapid development of digital payment is able to take over traditional payments because of protection and convenience.
Nonetheless
Linking Words
, a part of
inhabitants
Correct article usage
the inhabitants
show examples
 would be unhappy
due to
Linking Words
lose
Wrong verb form
losing
show examples
 their pleasures and a
chanse
Correct your spelling
chance
 to teach younger people.

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structure
The plan is not very clear. Show your view in one line in the start, then give 2-3 reasons, add a simple example, and end with a short wrap-up.
content
Some ideas are not built well. Explain why people may not like a cash move with 2 simple points.
grammar
Make the writing easier to read. Use small, clear sentences and check spellings like 'forseeable', 'prevalence', 'restaurants','coins'.
content
There is a clear idea that digital pay may replace cash.
structure
The writer tries to compare benefits and worries of people.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • cashless society
  • digital payment systems
  • financial institutions
  • transparency
  • illegal activities
  • privacy reasons
  • digital trace
  • technologically challenged
  • cybersecurity threats
  • technical failures
  • cultural attachments
  • resistant to change
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