IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

The chart desplays the percentage of people using internet, and the pie chart shows the avarage of spending on shooping on the internet in different countries

The provided bar graph illustrates
proportion
Correct article usage
the proportion
show examples
 of people
utilizing
Change the spelling
utilising
show examples
Use synonyms
internet
Correct article usage
the internet
show examples
, and the pie diagram demonstrates the people’s average
of
Check wording
expenditures of
show examples
 expenditures who shop on online applications in various states
Linking Words
such
Punctuation problem
, such
show examples
 as
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
Spain
Use synonyms
, France,
Sweden
Use synonyms
, Germany and the United Kingdom. The usage of
Use synonyms
internet
Correct article usage
the internet
show examples
 is the most common in
Sweden
Use synonyms
, meanwhile, it is the least preferred in
Spain
Use synonyms
. Indications of online
tradings
Fix the agreement mistake
trading
show examples
’
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
 are the highest in the UK
,
Punctuation problem
;
show examples
however
Linking Words
,
Spain
Use synonyms
 has the lowest rates.
To begin
Linking Words
 with, societies’
utilization
Change the spelling
utilisation
show examples
 of
Use synonyms
internet
Correct article usage
the internet
show examples
 accounted for 35% in
Sweden
Use synonyms
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
 the UK is following
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
with 20%. In Germany, the rate of
using
Verb problem
apply
show examples
internet
Use synonyms
is
Check wording
use is
show examples
 15%, meanwhile, these rates are equal to 10% in France and 5% in
Spain
Use synonyms
.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, the United Kingdom led the way in terms of expenses on shopping platforms with 87$,
moreover
Linking Words
,
Sweden
Use synonyms
 and France are following it with 76$ and 57$.
According to
Linking Words
 data, expenditures are equal to 46$ in Germany, per person
,
Punctuation problem
;
show examples
however
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
indication
Check wording
amount
show examples
 is 10$ in
Spain
Use synonyms
.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "however".
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Basic structure: Change the second paragraph.
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Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words internet, spain, sweden with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Percentage
  • Internet usage
  • Online shopping
  • Spending
  • Average
  • Comparison
  • Trends
  • Correlation
  • Insights
  • Countries
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