Some people believe that children should be taught how to manage money at school, while others think this is the responsibility of parents. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

There has been considerable debate about

children

Use synonyms

money

Use synonyms

management

Use synonyms

, which has divided public opinion into two main groups. One group of people believes that school teachers should be responsible for

taught

Wrong verb form

teaching

show examples

children

Use synonyms

how to manage

with

Change preposition

apply

show examples

finances,

whereas

Linking Words

the other group claims that responsibility should fall on

parents

Use synonyms

This

Linking Words

essay will discuss and examine both views

Punctuation problem

apply

show examples

before presenting my personal opinion.

According to

Linking Words

the first group of supporters, schools can provide

structural

Replace the word

structured

show examples

educational

lessons

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, through which

children

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can learn step by step

Punctuation problem

apply

show examples

how to manage

with

Change preposition

apply

show examples

money

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. In

this

Linking Words

way,

children

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could be equivalent learned to basic financial knowledge, saving

money

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, spending

money

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, investments and etc.

On the other hand

Linking Words

, the opponents claim that

children

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should learn financial

management

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at home with their

parents

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. Observing through daily activities, earning and spending

money

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such

Linking Words

as buying groceries, paying bills, vehicle and home

maintaining

Replace the word

maintenance

show examples

children

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can learn from real daily expenses.

Parents

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should be dedicated to

taught

Wrong verb form

teaching

show examples

their

children

Use synonyms

Change preposition

apply

show examples

valuable habits regarding saving and spending

money

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. In my opinion,

although

Linking Words

school's

money

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management

Use synonyms

lessons

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are essential and useful, the key role plays

children

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parents

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Parents

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are more influential in

children

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's education, and they can present

most

Correct article usage

the most

show examples

valuable and fundamental

lessons

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to their

children

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. In conclusion, both perspectives presented valid arguments.

Combination

Correct article usage

A combination

show examples

of both approaches could potentially lead to

perfect

Correct article usage

a perfect

show examples

mixture for

children

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money

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management

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lessons

Use synonyms

marjan_georgievski

Jan 6, 2026

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grammar

Keep your idea one by one in each line and use short, clear sentences.

content

Make your view clear at the start or end of the intro and in the end part, and add one reason.

content

Give one or two simple examples from life to show your point.

grammar

Fix form of the verbs like teach, taught and use 'money' not 'finances'.

coherence

Use very clear link words like also, but, so, for example to join ideas.

task

Two sides are shown and a final view is given.

structure

Intro and end are in place and the essay uses basic link words.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

firstly
secondly
thirdly
in additional
moreover
also
for example
for instance
therefore
however
although
even though
despite

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6
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
5
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
12
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

1 paragraphs

224 words

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