IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The first table below shows changes in the total population of New York City from 1800 to 2000. The second and third tables show changes in the population of the five districts of the city (Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island) over the same period. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The figures
illustrates
Correct subject-verb agreement
illustrate
show examples
 the changes in the total population
fo
Use the right word
of
show examples
 New
York
Use synonyms
City
Use synonyms
 from 1800 to 2000 and five
districts
Use synonyms
 of the
city
Use synonyms
. Overview,
first
Correct article usage
the first
show examples
 table below shows
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
New
York
Use synonyms
City
Use synonyms
 in all five
districts
Use synonyms
plus
Punctuation problem
, plus
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
manhattan
Fix capitalization
Manhattan
show examples
 and other
districts
Use synonyms
 of
brooklyn
Fix capitalization
Brooklyn
show examples
,
bronx
Fix capitalization
Bronx
show examples
,
queens
Fix capitalization
Queens
show examples
,and
states island
Use the right word
Staten Island
show examples
. The first
Use synonyms
districts
Fix the agreement mistake
district
show examples
start
Wrong verb form
started
show examples
 in 1800
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
 the population was about 80,000.After 100
years
Punctuation problem
years,
show examples
 it was a big
developing
Replace the word
development
show examples
it
Punctuation problem
. It
show examples
 was about
3,500,000
Punctuation problem
3,500,000,
show examples
Linking Words
this
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
 is a big number.
However
Linking Words
,
in2000
Correct your spelling
in 2000
 was one of the bid increases
at
Change preposition
in
show examples
 New
York
Use synonyms
City
Use synonyms
. In
Fix capitalization
Manhattan
show examples
manhattan
Add a comma
manhattan,
show examples
 it was less than in New
York
Use synonyms
,so it
start
Wrong verb form
started
show examples
 with 76% total population,but it
was
Verb problem
apply
show examples
decreases
Replace the word
decreased
show examples
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
 the other
yeras
Correct your spelling
years
it
Punctuation problem
; it
show examples
 was a big shock.
Finally
Linking Words
,
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
 the other
districts
Use synonyms
 we hope they will be
increases
Replace the word
increased
show examples
but
Punctuation problem
, but
show examples
 unfortunately the percentage was
reducer
Replace the word
reduced
show examples
 more than the
manhattan
Fix capitalization
Manhattan
show examples
,so in 1800 it
about
Verb problem
is about
show examples
quarter
Correct article usage
a quarter
show examples
 percentage and
this
Linking Words
 is more
unstabel
Correct your spelling
unstable
.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
▼
Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Replace the words york, city, districts with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "changes" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increases" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 3 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • people
  • city
  • five
  • district
  • grow
  • growth
  • rise
  • increase
  • increase
  • rise
  • fall
  • decline
  • high
  • low
  • big
  • large
  • small
  • more
  • less
  • over time
  • by year
  • in total
  • compare
  • compared with
  • whereas
  • trend
  • pattern
  • overall
  • feature
  • note
  • point
  • difference
  • lead
  • catch up
  • late
  • early
  • century
  • decade
  • period
  • 2000
  • 1800
  • 1900
  • continuous
  • steady
  • rapid
  • fast
  • slow
  • periods
  • numbers
  • data
  • report
  • describe
  • summarise
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