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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

In many workplaces, online communication is getting more common than meeting face to face. Do the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?

Is online
communication
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 the actual
way
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 to a bright future, as they say? Or do the cons really outweigh the pros? A question
that is
Linking Words
 very important to ask, as online
communication
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 is getting more and more popular in different workplaces around the world, some may even say
its
Use the right word
it's
show examples
 getting much more common than meeting
face
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-to-
face
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. Meeting
face
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-to-
face
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 helps people portray their ideas in a much clearer
way
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. Sure, you can open a video chat and pretend that it is just as good as a
face
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-to-
face
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 conversation in expressing thoughts, but that's just not the reality of it, as humans can comprehend real-life body language and facial expressions much better than on a screen.
Moreover
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, actually attending a
face
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-to-
face
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 meeting shows and improves the discipline of a worker,
while
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 helping them form a better connection with the workplace itself.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, meeting
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face to
Use the right word
face-to-face
show examples
face
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 can sometimes not be easy for
workers
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. Some may live far away, or need to be at home with their kids. Online
communication
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 helps
workers
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 who struggle to consistently attend
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face to
Use the right word
face-to-face
show examples
face
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 meetings by allowing them to communicate with fellow
workers
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 from their home.
Furthermore
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, online meetings are crucial for big companies that have
workers
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 all over the world
communicate
Verb problem
to communicate
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 ideas, as
its
Use the right word
it's
show examples
 pretty much the only
way
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. In my opinion, I do think that online
communication
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 is indeed the
way
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 of the future. Easier meetings, from anywhere in the world, from the comfort of your home, and more, are all advantages of online
communication
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,
that
Correct word choice
which
show examples
in
Punctuation problem
, in
show examples
 my personal view, outweigh the disadvantages.

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content
Add more real life examples to back your points and show how online work helps or hurts in real cases.
structure
Give more depth to both sides. Do not just mention a point once; explain it more.
grammar
Fix easy grammar errors and use simple words. Watch 'its' vs 'it's' and keep short sentences.
stance
You take a clear view that online work can be the future.
organisation
You link ideas with words like 'on the other hand' and 'moreover,' which helps flow.
content
The essay talks about both sides, not only one idea.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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