Art is considered an essential part of all cultures throughout the world. However, these days fewer and fewer people appreciate art and turn their focus to science, technology and business. Why do you think that is? What can be done to encourage more people to take interest in arts?

Nowadays, not many individuals pay attention to
art
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or think about choosing it as their career and lean towards other career paths
such
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as science, technology and business, even though it plays a crucial role in our society. In
this
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essay, I will explain the causes behind
this
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act and provide solutions to help raise awareness of
art
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. On the one hand, there are various reasons why
art
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is not appreciated
well
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as well
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enough like in the past.
Firstly
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, the low pay;
artists
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barely find good jobs that offer a good salary.
Secondly
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, the rise of AI and the increased use of it caused many
artists
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to lose their jobs and lowered the demand for designers and
artists
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.
For example
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, when someone is planning to open a cafe and thinking about creating posters,
instead
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of hiring a graphic designer to help him, he uses artificial tools and apps
such
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as Canva.
Thirdly
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, traditional
artists
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take a long period to create a good piece of
art
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with high-quality materials; unfortunately, the market requires and prefers high speed, which causes many
artists
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to not apply
to
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for
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these jobs.
On the other hand
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, there are solutions that can help reduce
the unemployment in
Correct word order
unemployment in the
show examples
Use synonyms
art
Fix the agreement mistake
arts
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. Governments should invest and hold local
art
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exhibitions to support
artists
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and help form a contract between business owners and local
artists
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.
In addition
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to that,
artists
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should start to build their social network to make their work more popular and to interact with companies to secure positions.
For instance
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,
engaging
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they engage
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in social media apps and
posting
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post
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their work.
Also
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,
artists
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should engage and host different events and classes to tell people more about
art
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and help promote it.
To conclude
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,
art
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is an essential tool in our society, and it helps define culture, heritage and custom;
therefore
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, governments and
art
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universities should encourage people to choose
art
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as their career.

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task response
To raise task response, fully answer both parts of the task. Add clear steps and more real examples.
coherence
To raise coherence, start each paragraph with a clear idea and link ideas with simple words like first, next, then, finally.
content
Add more examples of art jobs or events to show real life use.
grammar
Check grammar and fix small mistakes so the read is easy.
structure
Keep sentences short and use a topic sentence at the start of each paragraph.
structure
Clear two part idea: causes and fixes.
content
Intro and conclusion exist and are easy to see.
content
Some good examples used.
Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Technological advancement
  • Economic growth
  • STEM subjects
  • Job security
  • Financial success
  • Pragmatic
  • Utilitarian pursuits
  • Art education
  • Inclusive
  • Engaging
  • Contemporary society
  • Social issues
  • Environmental themes
  • Digital platforms
  • Virtual museums
  • Interactive art
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