IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3.5

In some countries, employees are generally given two weeks of paid vacation time each year. In other countries, employees are given four or six weeks of paid vacation time. Considering the needs of both employee and employer, what do you think is a reasonable amount of paid vacation time for employees to have?

Many people believe that
a
Correct article usage
apply
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Paid
Times
Fix the agreement mistake
Time
show examples
 Off, a defining term in the corporate world,
as
Use the right word
is
show examples
 somewhat critically important for workers. A small amount of designated free
times
Fix the agreement mistake
time
show examples
 can be a refreshment in the midst of a busy week.
However
Linking Words
, the given duration
sometimes
Verb problem
may sometimes
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maybe
Rephrase
apply
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vary in every region.
Therefore
Linking Words
, I believe
Use synonyms
two
Correct determiner usage
a
show examples
Use synonyms
weeks
Use the right word
two-week
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 duration suits
the
Correct article usage
apply
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best. In
this
Linking Words
 essay, I will lay out
two
Use synonyms
 reasons why it will be a win-win solution that might
benefited
Wrong verb form
benefit
show examples
 both parties.
First,
Linking Words
let us consider the correlation between productivity and salary expenses. As we might know, sometimes the paycheck itself is very costly because it works in a so-called billable hour mechanism. Whenever workers are not available, the tendency
of losing
Change preposition
to lose
show examples
 productivity will increase.
This
Linking Words
 particular situation could lead to the
lost
Replace the word
loss
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 of profit, if the employer grants their workforce
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
more
time
Use synonyms
 off.
Second,
Linking Words
the total
lenght
Correct your spelling
length
 of vacation
time
Use synonyms
 is commonly perceived as enough by society. Since the public holiday is not
inclusive
Replace the word
included
show examples
 in
this
Linking Words
 arrangement, the reality is longer than just
two
Use synonyms
weeks
Use synonyms
. Working people can enjoy up to four
weeks
Use synonyms
while
Linking Words
company
Correct article usage
the company
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 still maintain their sheet in balance. In short, vacation
time
Use synonyms
 for
employee
Fix the agreement mistake
employees
show examples
 is crucial.
However
Linking Words
, choosing the right durations
sometimes can
Correct word order
can sometimes
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 be tricky. Management will not be in
favor
Change the spelling
favour
show examples
in
Change preposition
of
show examples
 extending the
time
Use synonyms
 off duration
due to
Linking Words
 the fact that it could be harmful to the company's margin.
Moreoever
Correct your spelling
Moreover
,
two
Use synonyms
weeks
Use synonyms
 are still perceived as an acceptable norm.

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lexical
Use simple words and common phrases to show your point; keep sentences short and clear.
content
Grow each idea with a real example or fact to back it up, and link it to your main point.
structure
Improve flow by using linking words and fix spelling and grammar mistakes.
stance
You take a clear position on two weeks as the best time off.
organization
There is an introduction and a short conclusion that wrap the idea.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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