IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Completing university education is thought by some to be the best way to get a good job. On the other hand, people think that getting experience and developing soft skills is more important. Discuus both views and give your opinion.

It is believed that completing
university
Use synonyms
 education is thought by some to be the best way to get a good
job
Use synonyms
.
On the other hand
Linking Words
,
people
Use synonyms
 think that getting experience and developing soft
skills
Use synonyms
 is more important. In my opinion, I have both views on
this
Linking Words
 problem.
Firstly
Linking Words
, learners who study at
university
Use synonyms
 when
Correct pronoun usage
they graduates
show examples
graduates
Correct subject-verb agreement
graduate
show examples
 have the qualification to apply to a
company
Use synonyms
 that shows the subject they studied fits with the
job
Use synonyms
 , and they can do. In some cases, when completing
university
Use synonyms
 education, has a lot of
company
Use synonyms
 demand for young
people
Use synonyms
 who can do the
job
Use synonyms
 at their
company
Use synonyms
 with a good salary , so we can choose a lot and don'
t
Use synonyms
 need to
find
Verb problem
search
show examples
.
Secondly
Linking Words
, if young
people
Use synonyms
 have good qualifications but don'
t
Use synonyms
 have life
skills
Use synonyms
, they can'
t
Use synonyms
 do anything. Getting experience and developing soft
skills
Use synonyms
 is very important. Some soft
skills
Use synonyms
such
Linking Words
 as
:
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
 communication, cooking, self-care,...A person who has a good brain but doesn'
t
Use synonyms
 have life
skills
Use synonyms
 is always a loser. If you want to be successful, you must have both life
skills
Use synonyms
 and a good education from school, family...An experience shows that, in Viet Nam, a lot of young
people
Use synonyms
 after graduating from
university
Use synonyms
 hard to find a
job
Use synonyms
, but some
people
Use synonyms
 not study at
university
Use synonyms
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
 musn'
t
Use synonyms
 work in a
company
Use synonyms
, they do freelance jobs like freelancers, food reviewers, or some jobs on social media. That's not very hard, have flexible time and income is not small. In conclusion,
i
Fix capitalization
I
show examples
 think we must have to study at
university
Use synonyms
 and develop soft
skills
Use synonyms
, and have more experiences.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Task response
Your answer covers both views and your view, but ideas are not always clear or well linked. Try to make a simple plan: say your main idea in the intro, then give one clear point per paragraph with a short example.
Coherence and cohesion
Link ideas with clear connections. Use simple words and clear links like First, Next, Also, However, For example, In conclusion.
Lexical resource
Some words do not fit well and many sentences are hard to read. Use a small set of common words and keep sentences short and clear.
Grammatical range and accuracy
There are many grammar mistakes that make sense hard to read. Practice common sentence patterns and check your work.
Task response
You discuss both sides and give your view.
Coherence and cohesion
There is a clear structure with intro, body, and conclusion.
Grammatical range and accuracy
Some examples from life show you think about the issue.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: