IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

The bar chart below shows the top countries for the production and consumption of electricity in 2014. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The chart provided illustrates information about the top-ranking countries for
electricity
Use synonyms
 generation and manufacturing
electricity
Use synonyms
 in 2014, estimated in
kWh
Use synonyms
.
Overall
Linking Words
, China made up the largest amount of
production
Use synonyms
 and consumption of
electricity
Use synonyms
,
similarly
Linking Words
 with a slightly lower amount in the United States,
while
Linking Words
 the smallest two countries were Korea, Rep and Germany, and the others were stable in using and manufacturing 
electricity
Use synonyms
. China is the highest country in using and producing
electricity
Use synonyms
 at 5.398kWh and 5.22
kWh
Use synonyms
 respectively,
Linking Words
similarly
Replace the word
similar
show examples
with
Change preposition
to
show examples
 the United States
as
Punctuation problem
, as
show examples
 the second in consumption and
production
Use synonyms
 at 4.099kWh and 3.866
kWh
Use synonyms
.
In
Change preposition
On
show examples
 the other hand, Germany experienced
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
the lowest usage and
production
Use synonyms
 by 526.6kWh and 582.5kWh as the ninth in the ranking
,
Punctuation problem
;
show examples
however
Linking Words
 the Korea, Rep was the
last
Linking Words
 in the ranking at 485.1
kWh
Use synonyms
 and 449.5
kWh
Use synonyms
.
While
Linking Words
 other remaining countries
Linking Words
such
Punctuation problem
, such
show examples
 as France, India, Japan
...
Punctuation problem
,
show examples
etc
Punctuation problem
etc,
show examples
 were steady in
production
Use synonyms
 and consumption of
electricity
Use synonyms

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "similarly, while".
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Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
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Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words electricity, kwh, production with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • country
  • production
  • consumption
  • electricity
  • chart
  • bar
  • bars
  • year
  • 2014
  • top
  • highest
  • gaps
  • difference
  • more
  • less
  • equal
  • similar
  • different
  • lead
  • leader
  • rank
  • compare
  • overall
  • pattern
  • trend
  • demand
  • supply
  • import
  • export
  • own
  • use
  • need
  • large
  • small
  • big
  • close
  • near
  • however
  • in addition
  • although
  • while
  • show
  • data
  • figure
  • report
  • note
  • point
  • point out
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