IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Completing university education is thought by some to be the best way to get a good job. On the other hand, people think that getting experience and developing soft skills is more important. Discuus both views and give your opinion.

In older generations, where the job market was full of open spaces and higher
education
Use synonyms
 was not common amongst the
mass public
Check wording
masses
show examples
,
university
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education
Use synonyms
 was deemed to be a
secured
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secure
show examples
 pathway towards a successful career.
However
Linking Words
, in today's world where
the
Remove the redundancy
apply
show examples
the proportion of the population who have received higher
education
Use synonyms
 has been higher than ever, people's faith in
university
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education
Use synonyms
 has wavered. Nowadays, some people would argue that getting
experience
Use synonyms
 and developing soft skills is more important than completing
Use synonyms
university
Correct article usage
a university
show examples
education
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. Both sides have solid arguments
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
 both views will be discussed in
this
Linking Words
 essay.
Dispite
Correct your spelling
Despite
 the change of times,
university
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education
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 still has its merits. The first of which is that many professions require
specialized
Change the spelling
specialised
show examples
 training
that is
Linking Words
 exclusively offered by
universities
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. Certain
university
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 programs offer professional training and
administrate
Verb problem
administer
show examples
liscences
Correct your spelling
licenses
 that are
recognized
Change the spelling
recognised
show examples
 by the workforce. Some high-skilled professions may only accept applicants who have enrolled in specific
university
Use synonyms
 programs or provide higher salaries and better benefits to those who have completed
university
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education
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, making
university
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education
Use synonyms
 an irreplaceable advantage in terms of job hunting. The most apparent example would be medical doctors. Pre-service doctors are required to undergo training and receive
education
Use synonyms
 at
university
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, which is already a process of elimination on its own, to ensure that they are equipped with the
necassary
Correct your spelling
necessary
 skills and knowledge.
University
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education
Use synonyms
 is necessary for a number of good jobs. The second advantage is that
university
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education
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 boosts
one
Use synonyms
's reputation.
Although
Linking Words
education
Use synonyms
 is free and accessible to the mass public,
university
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education
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 welcomes only the higher academic achievers, since every
unversity
Correct your spelling
university
 has specific requirements for applicants in terms of their results in the public exam.
Moreover
Linking Words
, certain
universities
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, especially renowned
universities
Use synonyms
who
Correct pronoun usage
that
show examples
 have positive reputations in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society, have higher standards than others and will only accept applicants who are the best performers in the public exam.
For example
Linking Words
, in
Hong
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Kong
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,
Hong
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Kong
Use synonyms
University
Use synonyms
 is often regarded as the top
university
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. Compared to
universities
Use synonyms
 like The
Education
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University
Use synonyms
 of
Hong
Use synonyms
Kong
Use synonyms
 or City
University
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 of
Hong
Use synonyms
Kong
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, HKU has a better reputation
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
 its graduates are often considered more favourably by employers.
University
Use synonyms
Education
Use synonyms
 boosts
one
Use synonyms
's reputation,
However
Linking Words
, it is
also
Linking Words
 true that
university
Use synonyms
education
Use synonyms
 has its limitations in the modern era. First of all,
university
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 graduates are often regarded as lacking
Use synonyms
soft-skills
Use the right word
soft skills
show examples
, which are not part of the curriculum in most
universities
Use synonyms
.
Soft-skills
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such
Linking Words
 as communication, teamwork,
punctuality
Correct word choice
and punctuality
show examples
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
 are personal traits that are not specifically trained at
university
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. In the workplace, the aforementioned
soft-skills
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 are what
allows
Correct subject-verb agreement
allow
show examples
one
Use synonyms
 to smoothly
coorporate
Correct your spelling
cooperate
 with others and
makes
Correct subject-verb agreement
make
show examples
one
Use synonyms
 a competent employee. Without proper soft skills, the knowledge
one
Use synonyms
 learns at
university
Use synonyms
 will
render
Wrong verb form
be rendered
show examples
 useless. As for work
experience
Use synonyms
, first-hand
experience
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 will often be considered more important than book knowledge. Having real
experience
Use synonyms
 means that the employee can
pick-up
Use the right word
pick up
show examples
 things faster and have better insights
in
Change preposition
into
show examples
 the industry.
This
Linking Words
 cannot be acquired in
university
Use synonyms
.
Overall
Linking Words
,
education
Use synonyms
,
soft-skills
Use synonyms
 and
experience
Use synonyms
 are all equally important in today's
competative
Correct your spelling
competitive
 environment.

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coherence
Link ideas with clear and simple links. Use words like and, but, also, however to show how ideas are tied.
task response
State your view early in the essay and restate it in the ending to show a clear point.
task response
Add more details to each point and keep examples tight and on point.
structure
The essay discusses both sides and gives an ending view.
content
There are some real examples like doctors and Hong Kong uni to show ideas.
structure
There is a plan and clear end.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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