IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3.5

Some people believe that studying at university or college is the best route to a successful career, while others believe that it is better to get a job straight after school. Discuss both views.

People
Use synonyms
 hold different views about whether
people
Use synonyms
 should go
Use synonyms
college
Change preposition
to college
show examples
 or
university
Use synonyms
 before getting jobs. When some
people
Use synonyms
 believe getting
Correct article usage
a degrees
show examples
degrees
Fix the agreement mistake
degree
show examples
 makes
more
Correct article usage
a more
show examples
 professional career, others believe that working experience is better than studying
in
Change preposition
for
show examples
Correct article usage
a successdul
show examples
successdul
Correct your spelling
successful
 career.
This
Linking Words
 essay will discuss both perspectives before presenting my own view that having more experience in
Use synonyms
work places
Use the right word
the workplace
show examples
 is better than studying at
university
Use synonyms
 or
college
Use synonyms
. On the one hand, some
people
Use synonyms
 believe degrees can guarantee someone's knowledge
which
Punctuation problem
, which
show examples
 can make
people
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to be
Verb problem
feel
show examples
 assured. Many
people
Use synonyms
wants
Correct subject-verb agreement
want
show examples
 someone
whom
Correct pronoun usage
who
show examples
 with professional skills,
however
Linking Words
, it is difficult to know before they go through. In
such
Linking Words
 cases, when it is shown that someone studied at
Use synonyms
university
Correct article usage
a university
show examples
, it would be beneficial to convince their customers and employers.
Thus
Linking Words
, studying before getting a job may be easier to build a successful career.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, supporters of getting a job straight argue that working in real
Use synonyms
work places
Use the right word
workplaces
show examples
 can be quite different from studying with books. Even though
people
Use synonyms
 studied hard in
university
Use synonyms
 or
college
Use synonyms
,
still they may
Correct word order
they may still
show examples
 learn
skills
Correct word choice
new skills
show examples
newly
Rephrase
apply
show examples
that
mainly
Verb problem
are mainly
show examples
 used in practice. If they need professional knowledge, they can study
while
Linking Words
 they are working, and they believe it would be more effective to absorb and implement. In conclusion,
although
Linking Words
 many
people
Use synonyms
 support education in
college
Use synonyms
 or
university
Use synonyms
 before entering
work
Use synonyms
, I believe starting
work
Use synonyms
 straight
would
Rephrase
away would
show examples
 be more advantageous to step up to
Correct article usage
a recognizable
show examples
recognizable
Change the spelling
recognisable
show examples
 specialist.

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language
Work on grammar and sentence form. Use short, clear sentences.
structure
Make your view very clear in the introduction and restate it in the conclusion.
content
Add more examples or facts to back each main point.
editing
Check word choice to avoid mistakes like 'successdul' and 'want' and keep to common words.
content
The essay shows two sides and a view.
structure
Use of 'On the one hand' and 'On the other hand' helps show contrast.
content
There is a clear final view stated.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Academic qualifications
  • Specialized skills
  • In-depth knowledge
  • Personal growth
  • Social development
  • Practical experience
  • Financial independence
  • Career progression
  • Professional networking
  • Education
  • Work experience
  • Successful career
  • Personal interests
  • Career goals
  • Decision-making process
What to do next:
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