IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

The pie charts below show units of electricity production by fuel source in Australia and France in 1980 and 2000. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The four charts illustrate electrical
units
Use synonyms
 by power source in
Australia
Use synonyms
 and
France
Use synonyms
 in the
twenty years
Use the right word
twenty-year
show examples
 period between 1980 to 2000.
Overall
Linking Words
, sorted by year, these two countries only have 10
Use synonyms
units
Correct your spelling
10-unit
 difference for 1980 and 2000. In
Australia
Use synonyms
, Coal
had
Wrong verb form
has
show examples
 been the major source
using
Verb problem
of energy
show examples
 in their nation. In
France
Use synonyms
, none of them shared the biggest part until the year
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
2000. In 1980, it cannot be denied that coal contributed the main proportion for two countries, with exactly a half in
Australia
Use synonyms
 and more than a quarter at 25
units
Use synonyms
 in
France
Use synonyms
,
although
Linking Words
natual
Correct your spelling
natural
 gas equally held the same
portion
Check wording
proportion
show examples
 as coal did in
France
Use synonyms
.
However
Linking Words
, it was a different story in 2000. These two countries had their own featured source, whilst nuclear power contributed 126
units
Use synonyms
 in 180
units
Use synonyms
 in
France
Use synonyms
,
coal
Correct word choice
and coal
show examples
 took 130
units
Use synonyms
 in 170
units
Use synonyms
 in
Australia
Use synonyms
.
Therefore
Linking Words
, natural gas had been
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 minor
one
Fix the agreement mistake
source of
show examples
 using in both nations at 2
units
Use synonyms
.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words units, australia, france with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Only 4 basic words for charts were used.
▼
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • units of electricity production
  • fuel source
  • dominant source
  • reliance on coal
  • hydroelectric power
  • natural gas
  • significant reduction
  • primary source
  • drastically increased
  • transition
  • existing infrastructure
What to do next:
Look at other essays: