People should follow the custom and tradition when people start to live in a new country. To what extent do you agree or disagree.

When populations move to a new country, they must abide by that location's
culture
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and traditions. I believe that
this
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statement is true to a certain extent,
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however
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however,
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it is
also
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important that the
people
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moving do not lose their original identity. Certain
people
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refuse to assimilate
in
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into
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the societies of the countries they immigrate to,
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however
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apply
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they should do
this
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in order to not
disrupt
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to disrupt
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the locals. Almost all countries have unique customs they follow
,
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;
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if someone new doesn't follow these
customs
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customs,
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they may come off as disrespectful.
For example
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, in the Middle
East
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East,
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it is common that women dress more conservatively than they do in the West. It is reasonable for inhabitants of Middle Eastern nations to expect visitors
to
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apply
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not
dress
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to dress
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too provocatively in order to not
disrupt
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to disrupt
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them.
Secondly
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, certain
behaviors
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behaviours
show examples
may be accepted in certain places,
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however
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apply
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that does not mean that they are appropriate where they currently live. A prime occurrence of
this
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is seen in the United States, where all members of a crowd stand during the national anthem. Even if you are not an American citizen, it is a sign of respect to stand during the national anthem
,
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;
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not doing so would only unnecessarily disturb others.
On the other hand
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,
while
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it is important to do our best to fit
in to
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into
a new society, we must
also
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not lose the
culture
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we came from in the process. Humans require a strong sense of identity, and without
it
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it,
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they struggle.
For
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this
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reason, we must always remember where we came from. Greek
people
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demonstrate
this
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in a great way in the city of Warsaw, where they
organize
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organise
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monthly cultural events to represent their country and keep in touch with other Greeks. Another reason one must always represent their
culture
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,
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apply
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is
because
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that
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it is a great way to find
your
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their
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footing when moving. It is very difficult to start fresh, and
people
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from your home country can be of great help in making
this
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process easier. A common example is the Indian community, who are very tight-knit
no
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, no
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matter the place or time and always try to help one another
with
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in
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all situations.
People
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from your
culture
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, who experienced the same
difficulties
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difficulties,
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are more likely to help
,
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apply
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and can aid someone in more meaningful ways. In conclusion, I agree that we must respect the traditions of the nations we move to, but I
also
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believe we must not forget the
culture
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we left. We must preserve our own customs
as well as
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we can,
while
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simultaneously respecting the place we live in.

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task response
Make your main answer more direct in the first paragraph. Say clearly that you partly agree and why.
task response
Add one more short line to explain why people should follow local customs. This will make your answer more full.
task response
Some examples are good, but one or two feel a bit too general. Make them more exact and closely tied to your point.
coherence cohesion
Your essay is easy to follow. To make it even better, use linking words with more care and variety.
coherence cohesion
The second body paragraph is clear, but one idea could connect more smoothly to the next idea.
coherence cohesion
Keep each paragraph focused on one main idea first, then support it with examples.
task response
You answer both sides of the question and show a clear position.
task response
Your ideas are clear and easy to understand.
task response
You use relevant examples to support your points.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion.
coherence cohesion
The order of ideas is logical and easy to follow.
coherence cohesion
Most main points are supported well.
Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

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