nowadays, many young people leave home at an early age to either study ot work in another city. do you think this has more advantages or disadvantages for young people?

This
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topic is widly range controversial, especially in recent years with developments
of the
Change preposition
in
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Use synonyms
life's
Check wording
life
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strategies. In
this
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letter
Add a comma
letter,
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I will try to explain the good and bad aspects of
this
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issue from my viewpoint. To be honest, living with parents is a topic that
widely
Verb problem
is widely
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discussed,
wether
Correct your spelling
whether
it's helpful or not for
the youth
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young
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people's mentality and
life
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improvement. From my experience with my family, I think it is important to move out, especially in
earlly
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early
years after being
adult
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an adult
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when you are trying and attempting to find the suitable dreams that you will start to
acheive
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achieve
. I
am
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apply
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strongly support
the
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apply
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trying to know from their
experiances
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experiences
, but at the same
time
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time,
show examples
you should try to make your own.  Living for 24 years with my parents made me unsatisfied
about
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with
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my
life
Use synonyms
decisions and choices.
For instance
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, being afraid to choose anything that I should
decied
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decide
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by myself, but rather than
that
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that,
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I will just ask them to do that.
Moreover
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, you will not get enough time to make your memories from your individual experiences
and
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, and
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you will
stuck
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be stuck
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in
this
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easily protective
life
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. To clarify, I strongly support the matter of moving on at early twenties and
try
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trying
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to start your own
life
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's story from beggining.
However
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, it could be a difficult
experiance
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experience
at
the
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apply
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first,
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especially when you are trying to be responsible and
organized
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organised
show examples
, but it will
makes
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make
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your journey.
Therefore
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, the advantages of moving out are weighted more
the
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than the
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disadvantages.

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task response
Answer the question more directly. Say early in the essay if there are more good points or more bad points, and keep this clear in all parts.
task response
Add one clear bad point, because the task asks you to compare both sides. Then explain why the good side is stronger.
task response
Use more clear examples. Your story about your own life is useful, but add one more simple example about study or work in another city.
coherence and cohesion
Make each paragraph have one main idea only. This will help the reader follow your thinking.
coherence and cohesion
Use linking words in a simple way, such as First, For example, However, As a result, and In conclusion.
coherence and cohesion
Check sentence order and word form. Some parts are hard to follow because ideas are not joined well.
task response
You give a clear opinion in the end: the good points are stronger than the bad points.
task response
You use your own experience to support your view, and this helps the essay feel real.
coherence and cohesion
The essay has an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion.
coherence and cohesion
There is some use of linking words like For instance, Moreover, However, and Therefore.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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