IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

The two pie charts below show total world energy consumption and electricity generation for last year. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

✍️ Want to check your own essay?Try for free →
The pie charts
illustrates
Correct subject-verb agreement
illustrate
show examples
 the amount of global
energy
Use synonyms
 consumption and
electricity
Use synonyms
 generation in the past year.
Overall
Linking Words
, coal was the highest consumed
energy
Use synonyms
on
Change preposition
for
show examples
electricity
Use synonyms
, but lower
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
energy
Use synonyms
consumptions
Check wording
consumption
show examples
. The three biggest
energy
Use synonyms
 consumption
last
Linking Words
 year
was
Correct subject-verb agreement
were
show examples
 oil, coal, and gas, with 34.3%, 25.1%, and 20.9%, respectively.
Whlist
Correct your spelling
While
 other energies like nuclear, hydro, renewable waste, etc altogether reached the same percentage as the
uses
Check wording
use
show examples
 of gas. At the same time, the amount of coal consumed
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
 global
electricity
Use synonyms
 generation was the most significant consumer
,
Punctuation problem
;
show examples
on the other hand
Linking Words
, oil was the second-lowest
energy
Use synonyms
 with 6.7%. It is
also
Linking Words
 noteworthy that gas was the second-highest consumed
energy
Use synonyms
 with 19.6%, third was hydro with 16.1% and nuclear with 15.7%. It is clearly shown that other consumptions that are not shown were the lowest consumptions in both
energy
Use synonyms
 and
electricity
Use synonyms
 generation.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
▼
Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Basic structure: Change the fifth paragraph.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words energy, electricity with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
▼
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fifth paragraph.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: