Some say that music, art and drama are as important as other school subjects, especially at the primary level. Do you agree or disagree?

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It is argued that learning music,

art

Use synonyms

, and drama performances

are

Correct subject-verb agreement

show examples

as essential as other core subjects for young learners, especially in the primary

school

Use synonyms

. I completely agree with

this

Linking Words

statement because

this

Linking Words

can help them study more efficiently and boost their problem-solving

skills

Use synonyms

Linking Words

Punctuation problem

, as

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well as teamwork

skills

Use synonyms

Many primary

school

Use synonyms

pupils learn

playing

Wrong verb form

to play

show examples

instruments after

school

Use synonyms

and

Punctuation problem

, and

show examples

this

Linking Words

improves their performances in other subjects,

such

Linking Words

as mathematics and biology.

This

Linking Words

is because playing an instruments need them to

extremely focus

Correct word order

focus extremely

show examples

on the things they are learning, and through repetitive practices on the piece of music, young learners know better than others

about

Change preposition

apply

show examples

how to pay attention to the important things and content,

such

Linking Words

as study materials and teaching in the classroom, that ultimately boost their efficiency in studying.

For instance

Linking Words

, the psychology and children development

center in

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centre

show examples

at Harvard

university

Fix capitalization

University

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published a study in 2023 showing that the performances of biology and mathematics among children aged 10 to 12 are proportionally related to how many hours they spend

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apply

show examples

playing piano every week.

Moreover

Linking Words

, young children's problem-solving

skills

Use synonyms

can be improved by painting because it encourages their imagination. Our brain is divided into two hemispheres

and

Punctuation problem

, and

show examples

each part has its own function. The brain hemisphere controlling problem-solving

skills

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and imagination is the same one.

As a result

Linking Words

, we can train our brain to activate

this

Linking Words

area through doing

art

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activities which need imagination to complete.

For instance

Linking Words

, primary

school

Use synonyms

science teachers in China are using

art

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training to help their students to complete science projects and get higher

honor

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honours

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in the international competition.

Also

Linking Words

, performing a show on stage

enable

Correct subject-verb agreement

enables

show examples

students to boost teamwork

skills

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because they need to cooperate with other characters and the director. In conclusion, I believe primary

school

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pupils should put as much effort

Change preposition

into

show examples

music,

art

Use synonyms

and drama as they do

Change preposition

into

show examples

other subjects because they will learn multiple

skills

Use synonyms

, and

this

Linking Words

helps them become

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

efficient

learner

Fix the agreement mistake

learners

show examples

yayacacaeric

May 5, 2026

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task response

Make your main idea more clear in each body part.

task response

Add one more short and real example to support each main point.

task response

Explain your ideas in a more direct way. Some parts are hard to follow.

coherence and cohesion

Use linking words more carefully so ideas join in a smooth way.

coherence and cohesion

Keep one main idea in one paragraph. Do not mix too many points together.

coherence and cohesion

Check grammar in long sentences because small errors make meaning less clear.

task response

You answer the question clearly and give a strong opinion from the start.

coherence and cohesion

Your essay has a clear introduction, two body parts, and a conclusion.

task response

You use examples to support your ideas, which is good for IELTS writing.

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7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
16
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

325 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

holistic development
fostering
emotional intelligence
problem-solving skills
cultural awareness
curriculum
engaging
memorable
nurture
talents
core subjects
academic
professional success

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Some say that music, art and drama are as important as other school subjects, especially at the primary level. Do you agree or disagree?

Nowadays many people choose to be self employed rather than to work for a company or organisation why might this be the case? What could be the disadvantages of being self employed?

Some schools are very strict about their school uniforms and the appearance of their pupils, while other schools have a very relaxed dress code. What are the advantages and disadvantages of children of having a school uniform?

As countries develop, their populations tend to live individually or in small family units. In your opinion, what are the causes and what are the effects on both individuals and society as a whole.