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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The table below gives information about the daily cost of water per person in five different countries.

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The table illustrates the daily cost of water per person in five different countries, including
Tanzania
Use synonyms
, Uganda, Pakistan, the UK, and the US.
Overall
Linking Words
, it is evident that people in
Tanzania
Use synonyms
 spend more than in other countries on water every day,
while
Linking Words
 the US ranked the least. In terms of cost as
Use synonyms
percentage
Correct article usage
a percentage
show examples
 of the average daily wage,
Tanzania
Use synonyms
 again accounted for the largest proportion,
whereas
Linking Words
 the US registered the lowest
percentage
Use synonyms
. Regarding the daily cost of water,
Tanzania
Use synonyms
 ranked first at 6.4
cents
Use synonyms
, followed by Uganda at 4.1
cents
Use synonyms
. Pakistan and the UK
also
Linking Words
 spent 1.76
cents
Use synonyms
 and 1.3
cents
Use synonyms
, respectively.
By contrast
Linking Words
, people living in the US pay just 0.85
cents
Use synonyms
.
According to
Linking Words
 costs as
Use synonyms
percentage
Correct article usage
a percentage
show examples
 of the average daily wage,
Tanzania
Use synonyms
 accounted for the largest share at 5.7%,
while
Linking Words
 Uganda made up 3.2% of the daily wage. Pakistan
also
Linking Words
 constituted 1.1%.
In contrast
Linking Words
, the share for the UK was 0.013%,
whereas
Linking Words
 the US represented the smallest
percentage
Use synonyms
 at 0.006%.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also, whereas, while".
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Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 73%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words tanzania, percentage, cents with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Only 5 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 4 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
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