IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

You recently stayed at a hotel during a trip, but you were unhappy with the service you received. Write a letter to the hotel manager explaining what problems you experienced during your stay and saying what you would like the hotel to do about the situation.

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Dear Sir/Madam, I hope you are doing
good
Rephrase
well
show examples
. Unfortunately, I am writing
this
Linking Words
 letter to tell you that we had a very bad experience at your property. My Wife and I checked in a day before yesterday at 7 pm and were very much excited for our trip
but
Punctuation problem
, but
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 as soon as we entered our
room
Punctuation problem
room,
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 we saw some roaches running in the room.
In addition
Linking Words
 to
this
Linking Words
, the Washroom was
completly
Correct your spelling
completely
 stinking and even the cups were broken. We tried to
Complain
Fix capitalization
complain
show examples
 to the staff
but
Punctuation problem
, but
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 they were not responsive and were quite rude to us. At
this
Linking Words
 very moment i thought
i will to
Wrong verb form
I would
show examples
 complain to the manager of the Hotel. I would like you to take strict action
with
Change preposition
against
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 your
wmployees
Correct your spelling
employees
 who were not rude to us and give us the full refund with some Hotel credit
or
Punctuation problem
, or
show examples
 else
i
Fix capitalization
I
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 have to take
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the consumer court to show how filthy customer service you guys give to your
customer
Check wording
customers
show examples
. I appreciate your response to
this
Linking Words
 matter. Yours truly, Ayush SHukla

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task response
Task response: You tell the main problems and ask for action, so the letter answers the task. But some parts are not clear, and the end sounds too angry. Use a firm but calm tone.
task response
Task response: Add one short line about your room number or the date of stay. This makes the letter more complete and real.
coherence and cohesion
Coherence and cohesion: Your letter has a clear start, middle, and end. But some ideas are mixed in one paragraph. Put room problems in one paragraph and staff problems in another.
coherence and cohesion
Coherence and cohesion: Use easy linking words like 'First', 'Also', 'When', and 'Finally' to help the reader follow your ideas.
coherence and cohesion
Coherence and cohesion: Some sentences are hard to follow because of word choice and grammar. Shorter sentences will make your message clearer.
task response
Task response: You clearly say why you are writing and what went wrong at the hotel.
task response
Task response: You ask for a full refund and hotel credit, so your request is clear.
coherence and cohesion
Coherence and cohesion: The letter uses a proper opening and closing for a formal letter.
coherence and cohesion
Coherence and cohesion: Most ideas are in a logical order: stay, problems, staff, and action.
The Closing

The style of the letter determine how you have to close it.

Check out the suggested closing sentences for each type of letter in the General IELTS Test. The closing sentence should be the last sentence of your letter.

Formal style (To someone you have not met, whose name you don’t know)

  • Yours faithfully,

Semi-formal (To someone you may or may not have met, whose last name you know)

  • Yours sincerely,

Informal (To someone you know well, whose first name you know and use)

  • Best regards,
  • Warm wishes,

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