Some people think that government should ban dangerous sports while others think people should have freedom to do anysports or activity. Discuss both views and give your opinion

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Some citizens say that authorities must ban dangerous

sports

Use synonyms

Whereas

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Punctuation problem

apply

show examples

others believe

people

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must have

choose

Wrong verb form

chosen

show examples

sports

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or activities freely. I will discuss both views

Punctuation problem

apply

show examples

and give my opinion in the conclusion.

People

Use synonyms

learn

sports

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for different

reassons

Correct your spelling

reasons

also

Linking Words

some

these

Change preposition

of these

show examples

reassons

Correct your spelling

reasons

can make sure that they are safe. On the one hand, experts sometimes announce

about

Change preposition

apply

show examples

how dangerous some

games

Use synonyms

Verb problem

are.

show examples

Nevertheless

Linking Words

, players of these

games

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may play for money only,

Without considiring

Correct your spelling

without considering

the long-term injuries. They can have from these

sports

Use synonyms

While

Linking Words

Punctuation problem

apply

show examples

the only

people

Use synonyms

have

Correct pronoun usage

who have

show examples

a real benefit from these

the

Verb problem

are the

show examples

owners of the teams

Punctuation problem

apply

show examples

and

sponsers

Check wording

sponsors

show examples

of these

sports

Use synonyms

. They earn money during watch

people

Use synonyms

fight each other.

For example

Linking Words

, American football

players

Punctuation problem

players,

show examples

when experts announce that all

match

Fix the agreement mistake

matches

show examples

they hit each other

aggresively

Correct your spelling

aggressively

Linking Words

Also

Add a comma

Also,

show examples

their gears hit their heads, with

this

Linking Words

proggresively affects

Change preposition

apply

show examples

their brains. And in

long-term

Correct determiner usage

the long term

show examples

this

Linking Words

can make them more

able

Correct word choice

prone

show examples

have

Verb problem

apply

show examples

brain cancer,

also

Linking Words

their brain neurons

destroy

Wrong verb form

are destroyed

show examples

progressively.

Additionally

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New

Correct article usage

the new

show examples

generation can need to participate unconsciously in

this

Linking Words

sport. So, for

people

Use synonyms

safeity governments must ban these

games

Use synonyms

On the other hand

Linking Words

, some

people

Use synonyms

play

sports

Use synonyms

for different

reassons

Correct your spelling

reasons

but

Fix capitalization

But

show examples

these

sports

Use synonyms

can have a

lot

Use synonyms

of benefits on their lives. When, sometimes, doctors advise parents to participate

their

Change preposition

in sports for their

show examples

children who have ADHD

Change preposition

apply

show examples

sports

Use synonyms

such

Linking Words

box

Replace the word

boxing

and MMA. Because

Punctuation problem

apply

show examples

these

games

Use synonyms

have a high

potintial

Correct your spelling

potential

shrink

Verb problem

make

show examples

kids

angrey

Correct your spelling

angry

and their

high

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

movements. But

also

Linking Words

, they make

useful

Replace the word

use

of their

negatives

Correct word choice

negative

show examples

energies. When

Punctuation problem

apply

show examples

they hit one target for a long time and make a

lot

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efforts

Check wording

effort

show examples

Also

Linking Words

, these

sports

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can

learn

Verb problem

teach

show examples

people

Use synonyms

Punctuation problem

apply

show examples

how

they

Wrong verb form

show examples

defend themselves,

Especially

Fix capitalization

especially

show examples

Punctuation problem

apply

show examples

women. When

Punctuation problem

apply

show examples

they can face

problem

Check wording

problems

show examples

anytime, from

the

Check wording

people of

show examples

different

gender

Fix the agreement mistake

genders

show examples

. But these

sports

Use synonyms

can appear aggresively in TV, because

the

Change preposition

of the

show examples

international players and their ways of playing.

In contrast

Linking Words

, they have a

lot

Use synonyms

of advantages

Change preposition

show examples

Use synonyms

people

Check wording

people's

show examples

lives. In conclusion, some

sports

Use synonyms

appear

aggresive

Correct your spelling

aggressive

, but they have a

lot

Use synonyms

of advantages

Change preposition

show examples

Use synonyms

people

Check wording

people's

show examples

lives. When

Punctuation problem

apply

show examples

they help

people

Use synonyms

utllize

Correct your spelling

utilise

their energy in

right

Correct article usage

the right

show examples

way,

Linking Words

also

Correct pronoun usage

they also

show examples

help

people

Use synonyms

to protect

them selves

Correct your spelling

themselves

because

Change preposition

Because of

show examples

this

Linking Words

, in my opinion, all

people

Use synonyms

should play any

sports

Use synonyms

freely.

kohack23

May 26, 2026

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task response

Answer both sides in a more equal way. The first side is stronger than the second side.

task response

Give your opinion more clearly in the body, not only at the end.

task response

Use examples that are clear and short. Some ideas are hard to follow now.

coherence and cohesion

Make one main idea for each paragraph and explain it step by step.

coherence and cohesion

Do not use too many link words like 'also', 'when', and 'but'. Use them only when needed.

coherence and cohesion

Check sentence order and grammar, because many lines stop the flow of your ideas.

task response

You discuss both views and you give your opinion.

coherence and cohesion

Your essay has an introduction, two body paragraphs, and a conclusion.

task response

You try to use examples to support your ideas.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
59
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

356 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

dangerous sports
personal freedom
public safety
serious injury
risk of death
make their own choices
government control
free society
safety rules
protect lives
public health system
rescue workers
take risks
be responsible for
strict laws
safety training
age limit
safety equipment
reduce harm
in my opinion

What to do next:

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Some people think that government should ban dangerous sports while others think people should have freedom to do anysports or activity. Discuss both views and give your opinion

Public transportation is a great way to travel, particularly within a metropolis. The metro is the most convenient way to get around a city. Do you agree or disagree?

In some countries, more and more people are becoming interested in finding out about the history of the house or building they live in. What are the reasons for this? How can people research this?

You have a Facebook friend living in another country and s/he is curious to learn about a major news item in your country. Write a letter to your Facebook friend. In your letter describe a news story in your country explain why people are interested in it say how the story personally relates to you

The percentage of overweight children in western society has increased by almost 20% in the last ten years. Discuss the causes and solution of this disturbing trend.