Some people think that employers should ensure a pleasant working environment so that workers feel valued and will therefore work hard. Others feel that employers should be stricter with employees and monitor them closely to ensure they work hard. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

✍️ Want to check your own essay?Try for free →

Nowadays, the issue of creating an enjoyable and supportive working

environment

Use synonyms

has become highly controversial.

While

Linking Words

some people argue that maintaining an employee-friendly

workplace

Use synonyms

encourages workers to feel valued and appreciated, leading to greater productivity and loyalty, others believe that a stricter approach is more effective in ensuring

discipline

Use synonyms

and efficiency.

This

Linking Words

essay will discuss both perspectives before explaining why I believe a balanced approach is the most beneficial. On the one hand, establishing a positive atmosphere in the

workplace

Use synonyms

can bring numerous advantages.

Firstly

Linking Words

, when companies create an employee-friendly

environment

Use synonyms

, workers are more likely to feel respected and appreciated.

As a result

Linking Words

, they tend to work harder and contribute more enthusiastically towards achieving

organizational

Change the spelling

organisational

show examples

goals.

Secondly

Linking Words

, a supportive

workplace

Use synonyms

increases job satisfaction and encourages

employees

Use synonyms

to remain loyal to their company. In fact, many individuals decide whether to stay in or leave a job based on their

overall

Linking Words

level of satisfaction.

Furthermore

Linking Words

, even when offered better career opportunities

elsewhere

Linking Words

, some

employees

Use synonyms

choose to remain with their current

organization

Change the spelling

organisation

show examples

because of the strong sense of loyalty they have developed.

Therefore

Linking Words

, maintaining a pleasant working

environment

Use synonyms

is widely regarded as beneficial for both

employees

Use synonyms

and employers.

On the other hand

Linking Words

, a strictly controlled

workplace

Use synonyms

can

also

Linking Words

be advantageous in certain situations.

Employees

Use synonyms

who are closely supervised often demonstrate greater

discipline

Use synonyms

and productivity.

In addition

Linking Words

, strict monitoring helps reduce mistakes and prevents workers from taking advantage of their position. The constant presence of supervisors may

also

Linking Words

encourage

employees

Use synonyms

to seek assistance more confidently, resulting in fewer errors.

Moreover

Linking Words

, close supervision can help prevent

workplace

Use synonyms

bullying and unfair treatment among colleagues. Research has shown that in many

organizations

Change the spelling

organisations

show examples

where there is little managerial oversight, the number of complaints and conflicts tends to increase significantly. For these reasons, some people believe that employers should adopt a stricter management style and monitor

employees

Use synonyms

carefully. In conclusion,

although

Linking Words

strict supervision can improve

discipline

Use synonyms

and efficiency, creating a positive and supportive working

environment

Use synonyms

is generally more beneficial because it promotes job satisfaction, loyalty, and long-term commitment.

Nevertheless

Linking Words

, I believe the most effective workplaces are those that successfully maintain a balance between friendliness and

discipline

Use synonyms

olimjonovagulhayo040

Jun 4, 2026

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task response

Make your opinion more clear in the second body part, not only in the end.

task response

Add one more real or clear example to support your main ideas.

task response

Some ideas are good, but a few points are a bit general. Explain them a little more.

coherence and cohesion

Your essay is easy to follow, but some linking words are used too often. Try more variety.

coherence and cohesion

A few sentences are long. Shorter sentences can make your meaning even clearer.

coherence and cohesion

Make sure each main point links very directly to the question.

task response

You answer both views and give your opinion.

task response

Your main ideas are clear and mostly well developed.

coherence and cohesion

The essay has a clear introduction, body, and conclusion.

coherence and cohesion

Your paragraphs are in a logical order and easy to follow.

coherence and cohesion

You use linking words well, so the essay flows smoothly.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

15
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

357 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

6.5
band
what are the main problems associated with using social media plateforms ? What are the most serious problems associated with the it and what solutions can you suggest?
Social media has become an essential part of modern communication; however, its rapid growth has also brought several concerning issues. Although these platforms offer convenience and connectivity, they have simultaneously created major social and psychological challenges that must be addressed urgently.
6.5
band
Today, the high sales of popular consumer goods reflect the power of advertising and not the real needs of the society in which they are sold. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
n many countries today, the high sales of popular consumer goods are often seen as a result of strong advertising rather than genuine social needs. While it is true that modern marketing techniques have a significant influence on people’s buying decisions, I believe that consumer demand also reflects real needs to some extent. Therefore, the impact of advertising should not be overstated.
7
band
Today social skills are being more and more emphasized by employers. Some people believe that social skills are important besides good qualifications for their job success. To what extent do you agree or disagree ?
Being an employee is focused on not only hard skills but also on social skills these days. Some say that social skills are essential for job accomplishment,excluding hard skills such as coding, programming, writing, and so on. In my opinion, I have a balanced opinion on this issue,to be successful in any job position inevitably requires the two.
6.5
band
You recently did a short cookery course. The cookery school has asked for your feedback on this course, Write a letter to the course director at the cookery school, In your fetter describe what you enjoyed about the course say how much cooking you've done since the course suggest another cookery course you'd like the school to offer
I am writing with regard to your ask about my feedback on the cooking class which I took apart last week.
6
band
Increasing the price of petrol is the best way to solve growing traffic and pollution problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree? What other measures do you think might be effective?
Nowadays, the discussion related to solving the traffic and pollution problem has risen throughout the years. The idea of increasing the price of petrol might be the best solution at the moment. However, I must respectfully disagree with this notion as I believe it is just a shortcut solution and not a viable solution.

Some people think that employers should ensure a pleasant working environment so that workers feel valued and will therefore work hard. Others feel that employers should be stricter with employees and monitor them closely to ensure they work hard. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

what are the main problems associated with using social media plateforms ? What are the most serious problems associated with the it and what solutions can you suggest?

Today, the high sales of popular consumer goods reflect the power of advertising and not the real needs of the society in which they are sold. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Today social skills are being more and more emphasized by employers. Some people believe that social skills are important besides good qualifications for their job success. To what extent do you agree or disagree ?

Increasing the price of petrol is the best way to solve growing traffic and pollution problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree? What other measures do you think might be effective?