In many countries, primary and secondary schools close for two months or more in the summer holidays. What is the value of long school holidays? What are the arguments in favour of shorter school holidays?

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Nowadays, when countries have some seasons
such
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as summer and winter, schools give long
vacations
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for
students
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. If
students
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have a long
vacation
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, they can revise their studies
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, so
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so that it
Correct pronoun usage
which
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will help with their self-improvement.
Moreover
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,
although
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providing long
vacations
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has some benefits, some
parents
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believe that
students
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can addict some improper activities during their long
vacation
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. The complexity of
students
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' syllabus have been increasing significantly compared to the past because the world has become a competitive place. If
students
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have a longer free time, they can
memorize
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memorise
show examples
and revise their work;
consequently
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, they can reduce their stress level, which negatively affect for
students
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' performance, and it will definitely help them get higher grades for the exams.
For instance
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, Japanese scientists who conducted research have found some special details about longer holidays during the summer months. They prove that when pupils have holidays, it will hugely improve their study performances
On the other hand
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, some
parents
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believe that if
students
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have a longer
vacation
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, they can engage in some improper activities during their free time,
such
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as playing video games and watching cartoons.
Therefore
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, some
organizations
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organisations
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and
parents
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argue that we should shorten
students
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'
vacation
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.
For example
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, I have met many
parents
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during my internship as a teacher, and as their comments about the longer
vacation
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in Sri Lanka, I understood that if teachers can give some homework during the
vacation
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, we can prevent some improper activities, which are followed by
students
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. In conclusion, some people believe that if
students
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have longer holidays, it will help improve their academic performances,
while
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others argue that sometimes longer
vacations
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can negatively affect their academic routine, so they recommend that we should shorten
students
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'
vacations
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.

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task response
Answer both parts more fully. Write more about the value of long holidays and also more about why some people want shorter holidays.
task response
Make your main ideas more clear. Some points are too general and need a fuller explanation.
task response
Use more clear and real examples. Your Japan study example is not fully explained, and the parent example is quite general.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a clear paragraph plan, but some links are weak. Try to connect ideas in a smoother way.
coherence and cohesion
Some sentences are hard to follow because of grammar and word form problems. Use shorter sentences to make your meaning clear.
coherence and cohesion
Support each main point with one clear reason and one clear example.
task response
You answer both sides of the question.
coherence and cohesion
You have an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion.
task response
Your opinion is balanced and easy to see.
coherence and cohesion
Each body paragraph has one main topic.
Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general
Topic Vocabulary:
  • long holidays
  • short holidays
  • summer break
  • rest
  • health
  • family time
  • travel
  • reading
  • learning
  • memory
  • gaps
  • exams
  • curriculum
  • planning
  • cost
  • money
  • parent
  • teacher
  • student
  • school
  • summer school
  • enrichment
  • activities
  • schedule
  • fairness
  • access
  • inequality
  • support
  • spare time
  • staggered holidays
  • intersession
  • balance
  • policy
  • example
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