IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

The graph below shows the amount of money spent on books in Germany, France, Italy and Austria between 1995 and 2005. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

✍️ Want to check your own essay?Try for free →
The line graph
compare
Correct subject-verb agreement
compares
show examples
 the amount of money that has been spent on books in four
defierent
Correct your spelling
different
 nations which are in europe during eleven years
period
Use synonyms
Check wording
apply
show examples
time
Use synonyms
.
Overall
Linking Words
, from the
cpmarison
Correct your spelling
comparison
 data in every
country
Punctuation problem
country,
show examples
 we can
seen
Wrong verb form
see
show examples
 that
has
Correct pronoun usage
there has
show examples
 fluctuated changed.
In contrast
Linking Words
,
is
Correct pronoun usage
it
show examples
 has been increased
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
 the end of
Use synonyms
period
Correct article usage
the period
show examples
Check wording
apply
show examples
time
Use synonyms
.
However
Linking Words
,
there
Correct pronoun usage
they
show examples
 look different from
started
Replace the word
the start
.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, Germany has been spend their money for book as 80
millions
Fix the agreement mistake
million
show examples
 in 1995.
In contrast
Linking Words
, France has
been spend 58
Correct word order
spent approximately 58 million
show examples
million
Use synonyms
 approximately in 1995 and increased to 75
million
Use synonyms
 among 11 years
period
Use synonyms
Check wording
apply
show examples
time
Use synonyms
. Despite
, Germany
Correct pronoun usage
this, Germany
show examples
 has been dropped down to 83
million
Use synonyms
 approximately.
However
Linking Words
, they
reach to
Wrong verb form
reached
show examples
 97
million
Use synonyms
 in 2005
which
Punctuation problem
, which
show examples
 most spending.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, Italy
was
Verb problem
apply
show examples
fluctuated
since
Change preposition
from
show examples
 1997 to 2003. Which is
speding
Correct your spelling
spending
 around 55
million
Use synonyms
 approximately till
end
Correct article usage
the end
show examples
 of perod
time
Use synonyms
.
Moreover
Linking Words
, Austria
is increase
Wrong verb form
increased
show examples
 from 30
million
Use synonyms
 to 40
million
Use synonyms
 in 1999 and
steady
Verb problem
remained steady
show examples
to
Change preposition
until
show examples
 2001.
Thus
Linking Words
, it
was
Verb problem
apply
show examples
dramatically rose
up
Rephrase
apply
show examples
to 71
million
Use synonyms
in
Change preposition
by
show examples
 the end of
Use synonyms
period
Correct article usage
the period
show examples
time
Use synonyms
 which are most spending by
individaully
Correct your spelling
individuals
.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "however, in contrast".
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words period, time, million with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "amount" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "fluctuated" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "approximately" was used 3 times.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: