The bar chart illustrates the proportion of both male and female people in six different age groups in Australia doing regular physical activity in 2010. The bar chart below show the percentage of Australian men and women in different age groups who did regular physical activity in 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make the comparisons where relevant.

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The chart shows the percentage

the number

Check wording

apply

show examples

of Australian citizens in different age groups

that

Correct pronoun usage

who

show examples

commit regular physical activity in 2010.

Overall

Linking Words

, younger men tend to do more physical activites

then

Linking Words

the older groups mentioned. Women

Linking Words

Punctuation problem

, on

show examples

the other hand, their

proprtion

Correct your spelling

proportion

flectuated

Correct your spelling

fluctuated

and

its

Use the right word

it's

show examples

shown that older females do more sports

the

Correct word choice

than

show examples

the younger ones. It is shown that males commit more

physical

Change preposition

to physical

show examples

are

Verb problem

apply

show examples

hard sports in their younger year 15 to 24

Punctuation problem

, at

show examples

52%. After 25year their percentage had declined to 42% and continued to fall from ages 35 to 64%

reaching

Punctuation problem

, reaching

show examples

45%.Men above 65 and over have the lowest rate of doing

activies

Correct your spelling

activities

at only 46%. Women

Linking Words

Punctuation problem

, on

show examples

the other hand, are

oppoaite

Correct your spelling

opposed

mens

Check wording

men's

show examples

score. Younger females

Correct word choice

aged

show examples

15 to 24

activity

Verb problem

have an activity

show examples

rate

Change preposition

show examples

only 47% ,

Linking Words

Although

Fix capitalization

although

show examples

their score rose after 25 years at 48% percent. Their rates rose steadily till 52% at ages 35 to 54. The score continued to climp reaching

Correct determiner usage

its

show examples

peak point 53% for ages 45 to 64. The proportion fell to 46% for people above 65 year and over.

joudtbsm

Jun 11, 2026

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "on the other hand".

▼

Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "fall" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.

▼

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4
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
20
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

179 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

proportion
percentage
age groups
regular physical activity
participation rates
significantly higher
notable exception
decline
social factors
cultural influences
public health implications
demographics
engagement in physical activities

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