Environmental protection is the responsibility of politicians, not individuals, as individuals can do too little. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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There is a growing trend where millitary enviromment it is
goverment
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tasks, not common
people
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, as humans can't do a
lot
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of deals.
While
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some
people
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argue that politicians should protect
nature
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, I partly agree with the idea that
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goverment
Correct your spelling
governments
have more opportunity than
individuals
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and have
cash
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the cash
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to do it completely wonderful. The first reason why
i
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I
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support
individuals
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mean is that country
leader
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leaders
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always give money
some
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to some
show examples
region manegers
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regional managers
.
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Furthermore
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Furthermore,
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grant tasks,
such
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as
build
Wrong verb form
building
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new
complex
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complexes
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,
repair
Wrong verb form
repairing
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traffic and
add
Wrong verb form
adding
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some parks
because
Punctuation problem
, because
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prezident must do
everythink
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everything
to improve towns.
thats
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That's
why
protect
Wrong verb form
protecting
show examples
nature
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one
Verb problem
is one
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of the
politicians task
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politicians' tasks
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.
in additio
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In addition
,
goverment
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can build new modern parks and
urbanizations
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urbanisation
show examples
services to
throught
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clear
out the trash in natural places. As an example
in
Punctuation problem
, in
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a
lot
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of cities espesially in
USA
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the USA
show examples
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people
Punctuation problem
, people
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out
Verb problem
put
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the trash
in
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apply
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outside because their recyling service's weak.
Consequently
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, shield
nature
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is one of the most important goals of
goverment
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, because they have
opportunity
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the opportunity
show examples
and it's
region
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the region
show examples
leaders
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leaders'
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mission. The another reson why
i
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I
show examples
think
induviduals
Correct your spelling
individuals
should protect their habitat is that every
rubbish
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piece of rubbish
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or
crashed
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fallen
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trees
do
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affects
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citizens
,
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.
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Nevertheless
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,
goverment
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can't allocate cash because they have other drawbacks which
also
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need
respond
Verb problem
to be addressed
show examples
.
In addition
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, if
people
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stop
kill
Wrong verb form
killing
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their
ecosystem
Punctuation problem
ecosystem,
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this
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fact will
stop
Rephrase
no longer
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need protection.
For instance
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, if
people
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througt
Correct your spelling
throw
out the garbage in pacific urns
instead
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of
put
Wrong verb form
putting
show examples
it in
outside
Correct article usage
the outside
show examples
enviroment will stop demant millitary.
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Therefore
Punctuation problem
Therefore,
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individuals
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also
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should look at the ecosystem and
dont
Correct your spelling
don't
wait
goverment
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support to allocate other spaces. In conclusion, a
lot
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of
people
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argue that
goverment
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must protect
nature
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and
individuals
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should protect enviroment for themselves
i
Punctuation problem
. I
show examples
think
goverment
Use synonyms
should shield ecosytem, because a
lot
Use synonyms
cash
Change preposition
of cash
show examples
and opportunity to
compleated
Wrong verb form
complete
show examples
it better than just
throught
Correct your spelling
throwing
out the rubbish
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
special boxes. Words: 295

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task response
Task response: You answer the question and show your view, but your view is not fully clear all the time. Say your main idea in a simple way in the first part and keep the same view in all body parts.
task response
Task response: Your main points are relevant, but some ideas are hard to understand because of word choice. Use short and clear sentences to explain why the government and people both have a role.
task response
Task response: Your examples are not very clear or specific. Give one real and simple example for each main point, and explain how it supports your idea.
coherence and cohesion
Coherence and cohesion: Your essay has a basic structure with intro, two body parts, and conclusion. This is good, but some parts do not connect well to each other.
coherence and cohesion
Coherence and cohesion: Put one main idea in each body part. Start with a clear topic sentence, then add one or two supporting ideas, then an example.
coherence and cohesion
Coherence and cohesion: Some link words are used, but a few are wrong or not natural. Use simple link words like first, also, for example, and in conclusion.
task response
Task response: You answer all parts of the question and give your opinion.
task response
Task response: You try to discuss both government and individual action, which fits the topic well.
coherence and cohesion
Coherence and cohesion: Your essay has a clear beginning, middle, and end.
coherence and cohesion
Coherence and cohesion: You use paragraphs, and this helps the reader follow your ideas.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example
Topic Vocabulary:
  • environmental protection
  • responsibility
  • politicians
  • individuals
  • large-scale
  • policies
  • regulations
  • impact
  • corporations
  • environmentally friendly practices
  • resources
  • expertise
  • collective efforts
  • difference
  • combination
  • crucial
  • effective
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