IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

The graph below shows food consumption in Australia between 1950 and 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparison where relevant.

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The line graph illustrates
food
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consumption
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 in Australia between 1950 and 2010, covering five categories
:
Punctuation problem
:
show examples
 vegetables,
fruit
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,
meat
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, bread and seafood.
Overall
Linking Words
, vegetables were the most widely consumed
food
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 throughout the
period
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,
although
Linking Words
 the figure fluctuated over time.
By contrast
Linking Words
, bread and seafood remained at relatively low levels.
Fruit
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consumption
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 showed an
overall
Linking Words
 increase,
while
Linking Words
meat
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 was the only category that experienced a clear decline after 1990. Looking first at vegetables, Australians consumed more of
this
Linking Words
food
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 than any other category from 1950 to 2010. By the end of the
period
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, vegetable
consumption
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 had reached 160 kg per year.
However
Linking Words
, the trend was not completely steady, as the figure fell twice between 1960 and 1990. Bread and seafood,
on the other hand
Linking Words
, were consumed in much smaller quantities throughout the
period
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. Their figures remained comparatively low and showed less dramatic change than the other
food
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 categories.
Fruit
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 and
meat
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 followed different trends.
Fruit
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consumption
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 increased
overall
Linking Words
, with the figure in 2010 being around 60 kg higher than in 1970.
In contrast
Linking Words
,
meat
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consumption
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 fell after 1990, dropping by about 40 kg over the next twenty years. Compared with the other categories,
meat
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 was the only
food
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 whose
consumption
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 declined noticeably in the final part of the
period
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.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "overall".
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 71%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words food, consumption, fruit, meat, period with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 4 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 4 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "showed" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "trend" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "decline" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "fell" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "remained" was used 2 times.
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