IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 2.5

The plans below show a college café before it was redesigned and how it looks now. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

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The two diagrams compare the previous layout of a college cafe and its latest design after being modernised. In general, a major alteration is the introduction of new facilities, including the outdoor seating, a
berbecue
Correct your spelling
barbecue
 corner, and a salad bar. Some parts
also
Linking Words
 experience
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
shifting functions,
such
Linking Words
 as staff dining rooms, serving area, and bins. Meanwhile,
kitchen
Correct article usage
the kitchen
show examples
, toilets, and main serving area stay the same.
According to
Linking Words
 the diagram, it is evident that a considerable modernisation has taken place in the
cafetaria
Correct your spelling
cafeteria
, with the highlight changes
are
Wrong verb form
being
show examples
 the introduction of the outdoor seating and the barbecue facilities,
as well as
Linking Words
 the salad bar in the main building. To accommodate these parts,
a
Correct article usage
an
show examples
 entrance and exit door
has
Correct subject-verb agreement
have been
show examples
 built. Another notable parts are the redesign of the staff dining rooms to become a
take away
Correct your spelling
takeaway
 food and a coffee bar. Concurrently, the serving area
also
Linking Words
 converts
as
Change preposition
into
show examples
 a hot meals section. Enhancing
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
waste management, a bin improves as
recycling
Correct article usage
a recycling
show examples
bins
Fix the agreement mistake
bin
show examples
.
In contrast
Linking Words
, maintaining their shapes and functions, the entrance, kitchen and toilets experience no change.

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task response
Make your overview more clear. Say the main changes in one short part.
task response
Cover all key changes in a balanced way. Some points are clear, but some are too short.
task response
Use more exact comparisons, like what was removed, moved, or changed.
coherence and cohesion
Group ideas better. Put outside changes in one part and inside changes in one part.
coherence and cohesion
Check linking words. Some are used well, but some sentences still feel hard to follow.
coherence and cohesion
Avoid repeating the same idea. This can make the report less smooth.
task response
You gave an overview of the main changes.
task response
You mentioned new parts like outdoor seats, barbecue area, and salad bar.
coherence and cohesion
The report has clear paragraphs.
coherence and cohesion
You used some linking words like meanwhile, in contrast, and concurrently.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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