IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3

The threat of nuclear weapons maintains world peace. Nuclear power provides cheap and clean energy. The benefits of nuclear technology far outweigh the disadvantages. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own experience or knowledge. Write at

✍️ Want to check your own essay?Write on this topic →
Introduction
Nuclear
power
Use synonyms
 provides
cheap
Correct article usage
a cheap
show examples
energy
Use synonyms
sources
Fix the agreement mistake
source
show examples
.
Some times
Correct your spelling
Sometimes
 the present sources of
energy
Use synonyms
 like oil, gas
etc.
Punctuation problem
, etc.
show examples
 will be finished.
Body paragraph 1
Arguments in favour
nuclear
Change preposition
of nuclear
show examples
power
Use synonyms
:
The nuclear
Correct determiner usage
Nuclear
show examples
energy
Use synonyms
produces
Wrong verb form
is produced
show examples
 by chemical materials. It is comparatively
cheaps
Replace the word
cheap
 than other
energy
Use synonyms
. To produce the
power
Use synonyms
it
Punctuation problem
, it
show examples
 only
involve
Correct subject-verb agreement
involves
show examples
 some expert people and
Use synonyms
energy
Correct article usage
an energy
show examples
 plant.
Where to
Rephrase
To
show examples
 produce other
Use synonyms
energy
Punctuation problem
energy,
show examples
 it needs
large
Correct article usage
a large
show examples
involvment
Correct your spelling
involvement
 like
worker
Check wording
workers
show examples
,
machineries
Check wording
machinery
show examples
, etc.
And
Correct pronoun usage
It
show examples
also
Linking Words
 takes more time. The nuclear
power
Use synonyms
 plants are
wellprotected
Correct your spelling
well-protected
 and
monitor
Wrong verb form
monitored
show examples
.
That is
Linking Words
 why there is less possiblities.
Body paragraph 2
The threat of nuclear weapons maintains world peace because the developed Countries like
U.K
Correct determiner usage
the U.K.
show examples
,
U.SA
Correct determiner usage
the USA
show examples
, Canada, France
etc.
Punctuation problem
, etc.
show examples
 have nuclear weapons (
Warhead
Check wording
warheads
show examples
). Each
Country do
Correct subject-verb agreement
country does
show examples
 not give
threat
Correct article usage
a threat
show examples
 to other
Country
Fix the agreement mistake
countries
show examples
. Because
They
Fix capitalization
they
show examples
 know if
One
Fix capitalization
one
show examples
 country distrub other,
then
Linking Words
other
Correct article usage
the other
show examples
 will create problems
from
Change preposition
for
show examples
 them. So it is wellbalanced and world peace
maintains
Wrong verb form
is maintained
show examples
 peacefully.
Body paragraph 3
Though there are sometimes
creates
Verb problem
apply
show examples
problems
by
Verb problem
created by
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
nuclear technology
Punctuation problem
, but
show examples
but sometimes
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
it
also
Linking Words
help the
Correct subject-verb agreement
helps
show examples
 mankind in the
field
Check wording
fields
show examples
 of
medical
Replace the word
medicine
 and engineering
sector
Check wording
apply
show examples
. In the medical
field
Add a comma
field,
show examples
 we can say
by
Correct word choice
that by
show examples
 nuclear ray sometimes we can treat a
canser
Correct your spelling
cancer
 patient.
On the other
Linking Words
hand
Punctuation problem
hand,
show examples
 in the field of Enginering by the
nuclear
Punctuation problem
, nuclear
show examples
power
Use synonyms
 engineers can do
lot
Correct article usage
a lot
show examples
 of things
like
Punctuation problem
, like
show examples
 operate
engine
Correct article usage
an engine
show examples
instead
Linking Words
 of
electricity
Verb problem
generating electricity
show examples
.
Conclusion
In
conclusion
Add a comma
conclusion,
show examples
 we can say
though
Correct word choice
that though
show examples
 there are some Problem in the nuclear
power
Use synonyms
but
Correct word choice
,
show examples
 it has some
benefit
Fix the agreement mistake
benefits
show examples
 for
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
mankind

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task response
Answer the full question more clearly. Say if you agree, disagree, or partly agree in the first part and keep this view all through the essay.
task response
Add more clear support for each main idea. Explain why nuclear power is cheap and why nuclear weapons keep peace with one more simple reason or example.
task response
Use more direct examples. You name some countries, but you need one clear example that shows your point.
coherence and cohesion
Put one main idea in each paragraph. This will make your writing easier to follow.
coherence and cohesion
Use simple linking words better, like First, Also, However, For example, and In conclusion.
coherence and cohesion
Make sure each sentence connects well to the one before it. Some ideas now jump too fast.
task response
You answer both parts of the topic: energy and weapons.
coherence and cohesion
Your conclusion is present and it matches your main idea.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has clear paragraphs for different ideas.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Deterrence
  • Mutually assured destruction
  • Greenhouse gases
  • Cost-effective
  • Radiation therapy
  • Proliferation
  • Rogue states
  • Radioactive waste disposal
  • Catastrophic accidents
  • Climate change
What to do next:
Look at other essays: