Many schools allocate a significant portion of their budget to sports programs, while others focus more on academics or arts. In your opinion, should sports receive more funding in school budgets compared to other areas? Provide detailed reasons and examples to support your perspective.

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There is an ongoing debate regarding school budget allocation. A group of individuals believe that
academics
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or art play a more central role
compare
Wrong verb form
compared
show examples
with
sports
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programs .
However
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, others argue that comes with
academics
Use synonyms
and art ,
schools
Use synonyms
Linking Words
also should
Correct word order
should also
show examples
focus on
sports
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programs for
students
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.
Therefore
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, ahead of my
opinion
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, both
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
views will be discussed
further
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. Examining the former
opinion
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, the primary
at
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apply
show examples
argument the supporters would put forward is that
schools
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should invest in
academics
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and
arts
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because these subjects play a vital role in educational
achivements
Correct your spelling
achievements
and future careers of
students
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.
This
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is because education helps individuals broaden horizon and widen
knowledge
Correct article usage
the knowledge
show examples
that
students
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need for higher education and future careers.
.
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
It can serve as an efficient way to develop personal and
proffesional
Correct your spelling
professional
growth.
In addition
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, they
also
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believe that
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arts
Correct article usage
the arts
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are essential for individuals . The reason is that many works of art and architecture preserve the traditions and values of
peoples
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people
show examples
over many periods.
Moreover
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,
academics
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or
arts
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enhances
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enhance
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creativity and critical thinking , which are more important in today's changing world.
On the contrary
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, those in favour of the latter
opinion
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have their own arguments.
To begin
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with, they claim that
sports
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also
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play a crucial role in mental and physical well-being.
Sports
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facilities
such
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as swimming pools , soccer and badminton courts provide opportunities for people to take part in physical activities.
As a result
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, allows people
build
Verb problem
to build
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muscle strength , stay in shape and increase
the
Correct article usage
their
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immune system.
Moreover
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,
sports
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activities
also
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improve mental health by reducing stress and boosting mood after a long day .
Therefore
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,
schools
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need to invest in
sports
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facilities to encourage people to maintain
healthier
Correct article usage
a healthier
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lifestyle.
To conclude
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and offer my position , there are convincing arguments both for and against that
schools
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just invest
budget
Correct determiner usage
their budget
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in
academics
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and
arts
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because it is more important than
sports
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.
However
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, I certainly favour the latter
opinion
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because
sports
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also
Verb problem
are also
show examples
crucial like
academics
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and
arts
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.
Instead
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of
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apply
show examples
,
schools
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need to combine
between
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apply
show examples
academics
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or
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with
show examples
arts
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and
sports
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activities because both
them
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
are essential for
students
Use synonyms
.

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task response
Answer the main question more clearly. Say early if sports should get more money or not.
task response
Give one or two real examples to support your ideas.
task response
Make each main idea clear and explain it fully.
coherence and cohesion
Use simple linking words well, like first, also, however, and so.
coherence and cohesion
Check sentence order so each idea flows to the next one.
coherence and cohesion
Keep one main idea in one paragraph.
task response
You discuss both sides of the topic.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion.
task response
Your opinion is given in the end.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example
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