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Band 7

The charts below show employment rates of males and females of different ages and the average age of their youngest child.

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The charts below show employment rates of males and females of different ages and the average age of their youngest child.
The first bar graph provides information about the
percentage
Use synonyms
 of
men
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 and
women
Use synonyms
 workers of different ages,
while
Linking Words
 the second chart illustrates the average age of employees’ youngest child.
Overall
Linking Words
,
it is clear that
Linking Words
 the highest
rate
Use synonyms
 is recorded by females at the age of 35-49,
whereas
Linking Words
men
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 who are 16-25
years
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 old constituted the lowest figure. The youngest
children
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who
Punctuation problem
, who
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 are 16-20
years
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old
Punctuation problem
old,
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 are the youngest
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children
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apply
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in terms of
rate
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. Observing in detail, the figures for
men
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 and
women
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 who are over 60
years
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 old represented 25% and 35%, relatively. There is a similar
percentage
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 of 50-59, and 35-49 males and females, accounting or 70% and 80%, respectively. The figure for males who are 26-34 decreased to 65%,
while
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 the
women
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’s
rate
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 made up 70%. The smallest
percentage
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 is shown by
men
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 and
women
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 who are 16-25
years
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 old, constituting 20% and 15%, respectively. Turning to the average
percentage
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 of workers’ youngest
children
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, 21-25
years
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 old
women
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 and
men
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 showed 72% and 62%, respectively. The figures for 16-20-year-olds
years
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 old, and 11-15-year-oldsyears old people represented a similar index to that of 21-25-year-olds
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apply
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years
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 old people. There is a decline in the
rate
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 of boys and girls who are 6-10
years
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 old, representing 75% and 55%. The figure for
children
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 who are around 0-5
years
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 old showed a similar index, constituting 60%.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Vocabulary: Replace the words percentage, men, women, rate, years, children with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 5 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 5 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "represented" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "showed" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 4 times.
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