Many women today are delaying getting married and starting a family. Give the reasons for this new trend. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

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The world has greatly changed , and that includes the role of
women
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.
Women
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today
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are delaying getting married.
This
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also
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affects their ideas of starting a family.
This
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essay will examine the reasons for
this
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trend , and I will provide an assessment of whether it is a positive or negative development. On the one hand, there are multiple reasons why
women
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are not getting married at a young
age
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.
First,
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women
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beliave
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believe
that education is a priority .
For
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example
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example,
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they have
amaizing aportenity
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amazing opportunity
to study at
univercity
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university
.
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Also
Add a comma
Also,
show examples
women
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views
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view
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education as a platform for
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future
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a future
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career.
Second,
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young
women
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today
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want to enjoy life as
a
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apply
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young
adult
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adults
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.
For instance
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,
traviling
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travelling
and discovering the world is a
wonderfull experince
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wonderful experience
.
Also
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, spending quality time with best friends is possible.
Finally
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,
Today
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there is much less social
prressure
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pressure
.
For example
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, most parents would be totally against the idea of their children getting married at a young
age
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.
Also
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, since most young
women
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are attending University, marriages are delayed, which reduces peer pressure.
On the other hand
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, I totally believe that
this
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is a tremendously positive development.
First,
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getting married at a later time ensures improved decisions.
For example
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, as girls get older, they develop better judgment.
Also
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, with
age
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, they become more mature and have more knowledge and perspective.
Second,
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improved decision-making reduces the odds of a
future
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divorce. Getting married at an older
age
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lessens the chances of picking the wrong partner,
thus
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lowering
future
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divorce.
This
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also
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ensures a longer , happier marriage.
Finally
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, delaying marriage allows young
women
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to attend University and transition into
future
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professions.
In addition
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,
this
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would create more intelligent
,
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apply
show examples
and fully rounded females, allowing for personal
grow
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growth
. In conclusion, it is clear to see that there are multiple reasons why
women
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today
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delay marriage.
Also
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, I strongly agree that
this
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is a positive sociological development.

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task response
Overall score: 6. Your answer is clear, but some points need more detail. Explain more clearly how study, work, and travel lead women to wait before marriage.
task response
Some examples are too general. For example, say that a woman may finish university, get a job, and save money before she starts a family.
task response
Your good side is clear, but add one short bad side and then explain why the good side is still stronger. For example, later family plans can make having children harder for some women.
task response
Be careful with the idea about parents. You say there is less social pressure, but then say most parents are against early marriage. Explain this link more clearly.
coherence and cohesion
Your order is good, but some sentences repeat the same point. Join close ideas so each paragraph has one clear path.
coherence and cohesion
Use link words with care. Do not begin too many sentences with Also. Try words like This means, As a result, and Because of this.
coherence and cohesion
Make the first body paragraph focus only on reasons. Make the second body paragraph focus only on why you think the trend is good.
coherence and cohesion
Your ending is clear, but it can be stronger: restate the two main reasons and your view in one or two short sentences.
task response
You answer both parts: you give reasons for later marriage and say it is positive.
task response
Your main ideas are clear: study, work, life goals, and better choices in marriage.
coherence and cohesion
The essay has a clear start, two body parts, and an ending.
coherence and cohesion
You use simple link words such as First, Second, Finally, For example, and In addition.
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