IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

In many countries , more people are choosing to live alone instead of with their families.

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In many countries, more
people
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 choose to live alone
instead
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 of living with their families. I think
this
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 trend has both advantages and
disadvantages
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, but in my
opinion
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opinion,
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 the advantages are bigger than the
disadvantages
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. On the one hand , living alone helps
people
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 become more independent. They learn how to cook, clean the house and manage their money by themselves.
Also
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, they can make their own decisions without asking other family members.
For example
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, they can study or work at any time they want because nobody disturbs them.
On the other hand
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, there are some
disadvantages
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.
People
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 who live alone sometimes feel lonely and stressed because they do not have anyone to talk to every day.
In addition
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, they have to pay all the bills by themselves, so it can be expensive. If they become sick, there may be nobody to help them immediately. In conclusion, with the points stated above, I can safely say that
people
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 have different views about the merits and demerits of living alone
instead
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 of living with their families. On a more personal level, I strongly believe that the advantages of
this
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 trend are far greater than the
disadvantages
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.

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task response
Score: 6. Add more detail to each main idea. For example, say why living alone helps a person grow, or give one clear real-life case.
task response
Your example about study and work is useful, but it is short. Explain how this freedom can help people do better at work or school.
task response
Make your own view stronger. In the last part, say why the good points are greater than the bad points, not only that you think so.
coherence and cohesion
Score: 7. Your order is easy to follow. To make it better, link each idea more closely. For example: “This means that...” or “As a result, ...”.
coherence and cohesion
Some parts repeat the same point. In the end, you can say your view in a more direct way and not repeat “advantages” and “disadvantages” many times.
coherence and cohesion
Use one main idea in each part, then add a reason and an example. This will make your writing feel more full and well linked.
task response
You answer the question clearly. You give both good and bad points, and you say that the good points are stronger.
task response
Your ideas are on topic: being free, feeling alone, money, and help when sick.
coherence and cohesion
The essay has a clear start, two main parts, and an end.
coherence and cohesion
You use clear links such as “On the one hand”, “On the other hand”, “Also”, and “In addition”.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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