IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3

living in a country where you have to speak a foreign languages can cause serious social problems as well as practical problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

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Introduction
Nowadyas
Correct your spelling
Nowadays
,
while
Linking Words
 some people believe that
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
 living in a community where you have to speak
thier
Correct your spelling
their
language
Use synonyms
 has
nomirous
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numerous
 positive aspects, most
peoble
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people
 agree that
the
Correct article usage
apply
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living in
such
Linking Words
kind of
Correct determiner usage
a
show examples
 country could
couse
Correct your spelling
cause
 serious social and practical problems. I totally agree with
this
Linking Words
statemnt
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statement
, as the native
language
Use synonyms
 is the main factor in the relationships.
Body paragraph 1
Looking at the other people's
arguemnt
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argument
, they say that
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
 there
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
 no problems
while
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 living in a country where you have to speak the
countrie's
Correct your spelling
country's
language
Use synonyms
, not your native
.
Check wording
language.
show examples
However
Linking Words
 i don't think
this
Linking Words
argue
Replace the word
argument
 is valid,
becouse
Correct your spelling
because
, as a
nature
Check wording
matter of the nature
show examples
 of the nations,
will
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they will
show examples
 not
easly
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easily
 accept
to build
Wrong verb form
building
show examples
 relations with persons who are not related to
thier
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their
 mother
language
Use synonyms
.
As a result
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, defentley un-related feeling will be
thes
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the
 first social problem
could be faced by
Verb problem
apply
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that
person
Correct article usage
a person
show examples
.
Verb problem
will face.
show examples
we
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We
show examples
 can clearly
noted
Wrong verb form
note
show examples
 that in
USA
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the USA
show examples
,
Newyork city specificly
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New York City specifically
, there are
defferent
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different
 therapies away from the center build for
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
foreign
peoble
Correct your spelling
people
.
Linking Words
although
Capitalize the word
Although
show examples
 they are speaking
english
Capitalize the proper name
English
show examples
, they are living away from the
centers
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centres
show examples
.
Body paragraph 2
The
language
Use synonyms
 is the main factor to build
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
strong relations with
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
other nations,
espicially
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especially
 if it is the native
language
Use synonyms
.
Conclusion
in
Capitalize the word
In
show examples
 summary,
i
Fix capitalization
I
show examples
 would say that
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
 living in a place
you
Correct word choice
where you
show examples
 have to speak another
language
Use synonyms
 has several harmfuls, how could
person
Correct article usage
a person
show examples
 feel related to
this
Linking Words
 place
as
Correct word choice
when
show examples
 the residents
feels
Correct subject-verb agreement
do
show examples
 not to hem
.
Change the punctuation
?
show examples

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task response
Your view is clear: you agree that a new language can cause social and practical problems. However, you mainly write about social problems. Add a full body paragraph about practical problems, such as work, school, health care, travel, forms, and speaking to public workers.
task response
Explain each main idea in more detail. For example, show how poor language skills can make a person feel alone, and how this can make it hard to make friends or join local life.
task response
Your New York example is not clear and does not strongly prove your point. Use a simple, clear example: a new worker may not understand safety rules, or a parent may not understand a doctor.
task response
Avoid spending much time on the other side if you do not explain it well. State the other view in one or two lines, then clearly show why you disagree.
coherence and cohesion
Use a clear four-part plan: introduction, social problems, practical problems, and conclusion. Each body paragraph should have one main idea and a short example.
coherence and cohesion
Some sentences are hard to follow because the idea is not fully stated. Use short sentences with a clear order: main point, explanation, example, result.
coherence and cohesion
Link ideas with simple words such as 'First', 'For example', 'As a result', 'In addition', and 'Therefore'. Do not use a link word when the next idea is not connected.
coherence and cohesion
The final paragraph repeats your view, but it needs a clearer ending. Briefly restate both social and practical problems, then give your final view.
task response
You give a clear opinion from the start and keep the same view through the essay.
task response
You try to include a real-world example, which is a good way to support an idea.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has an introduction, a main discussion, and a short ending.
coherence and cohesion
You use some linking words, such as 'However', 'As a result', and 'In summary', to show the movement of ideas.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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